Hello readers & random people who just found this blog. To the readers I say, welcome back. To the random people I say, welcome and I hope you enjoy the blog. So everyone needs to pass through their teenage years to be an adult right? And eveyrone has a diffrent teenage life. I feel like who a person is as a teenager kind of shines a light on who they will become later. Now it thats true, then I want to start working on myself to become that adult i'm dying to be. I've been one of those people that looks forward to "when I grow up..." forever. Ever since a little girl childhhod was something I needed to get through to reach that grown up stage, where I have my own job, home, and a dream guy. I still to this day daydream like 50% of the time. But what I need to figure out is how to work towards that. Maybe step one is opening a dream future fund and starting to save my money for all the things that I want. That seems like a good idea, i'll start after I get back from vacation.
For the first time in basically ever I'm having trouble coming up with things to write on the blog. Its like I just don't talk as much anymore. It helped me realize that school really does inspire me on things to write about. I still hear gossip though inspiring the next subject...
So I don't know about the schools tha tyou attend but the school that I go too has "crunk" high schoolers. crunk meaning crazy and drunk high schoolers. A pretty decent population of the school drinks and how do they not get caught? They go out into the woods where there are no police and they do all the bad things. I personally don't believe in drinking while your under 21 because your brain isen't done growing, and I just don't think you need to be getting drunk at such a young age. I don't oppose to people drinking as adults. Thats fine as long as you don't go over the top with it. A glass of wine at dinner is actually good for you. But this little message is me doing my part to help other teenagers my own age. Don't do anything thats illegal. k? k. Because the reason there are laws keeping people from things is because their not good for you. The people that make these laws are very intelligent and you all should listen to them if you want to better your lives and make it to the "when I grow up day". I hope you all take me seriously.
song of the day: When I grow up - Pussy Cat Dolls
Current songs that I love: Nothin on you - B.o.b and bruno mars, Impossible - Shantelle, Find you love - Drake, California Gurls - Katy Perry, Your love is my drug - Ke$ha, Break even - the script, OMG - Usher, Airplanes B.o.B. (MY current FAV!), Ridin' solo and solo (still love), I like it - Enrique Iglasias, I never told you - Colbie Colliat, and Beautiful Day- Lee DeWyze
Quote of the day: Action is the foundational key to all success - Pablo Picasso
About Me
- Forever yours, Mariam
- My name is Mariam and through this blog I'm discovering things about the world, and about myself. Through all my blogs you'll see craziness, political insight, celebrity mania, musical interest, total drama queen-ness,all about boys, and ever changing views on everything. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoy writing it. You're about read the pages of my epic diary. Welcome to my world, and feel free to come back ;)
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Friday, May 28, 2010
" I don't wanna be anything other then what i've been tring to be latley..."
Hello Everyone!
I wanted to start this blog by saying happy belated fourth Birthday to Shiloh Jolie-Pitt. For those of you who don't know much about her shes the love child of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. They have 6 children together but are not legally married. Now a little downer on shiloh is her new haircut. Don't get me wrong, shiloh is an adorable little girl but the past couple years shilohs been looking like an adorable little boy. Now i've been thinking this to myself for quite awhile now,so I decided to type it in google and it turns out that this has been a big deal in the news. It even made the new york times. Recently angelina Jolie and Brad got Shiloh a haircut and she looks like this....
If I passed her on the street with no prior knowledge of who she was I would think she was a boy. She hasen't always been a tomboy though, as you can see in this picture...
In recent years Shiloh Jolie Pitt has been dressing more and more like a boy and the new haircut just took it to the next level. Now people are wondering if this could effect her longterm and she could become "gender confused". I'm a believer in the fact that people are born with a blank mind, and what you are taught and what you see is what you become. So if shiloh grows up in boy clothes, with a boy haircut, and wanting to be called "john" (brad pitt said this himself), then shes going to think that she is a boy named john. But if this whole john thing had never been taken seriously in the first place then maybe she would go by Shiloh, which is a really nice name. The early show had all kind of psycologists analyzing the whole thing and they said, its not biggie, let her express herself. Other people were saying tha that shes wearing her brothers hand-me downs (but come on people this is shiloh jolie pitt, her parents have enough money to buy every girl in africa louis vuittons. they can afford it). In touch magazine blamed the whole thing on angelina jolie, but I doubt she wants her sweet daughter to be a boy, because she dresses zahara as a girl. exhibit A....
the reality is simple though, shes just a four year old. What shes wearing is no big deal. Not all four year olds can be like Suri Cruise and what kind of world would this be if they are. It just was a big news story recently and I thought i'd cover it.
Song of the day: I don't wanna be (old one tree hill theme song) by Gavin Degraw. I thought this song was appropriate since shilohs just being who she wants.
quote of the day: “She only wants to be called John. John or Peter. So it’s a Peter Pan thing,” he says. “So we’ve got to call her John. ‘Shi, do you want …’ – ‘John. I’m John.’ And then I’ll say, ‘John, would you like some orange juice?’ And she goes, ‘No!’ So, you know, it’s just that kind of stuff that’s cute to parents, and it’s probably really obnoxious to other people.” -Brad Pitt
Newsflash of the day: Gary Coleman died at the age of 42 today. He was put on life support early this morning and his family had to pull the plug, and terminated his life. He had some brain, kidney, and other problems. May he R.I.P. forever and ever
I wanted to start this blog by saying happy belated fourth Birthday to Shiloh Jolie-Pitt. For those of you who don't know much about her shes the love child of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. They have 6 children together but are not legally married. Now a little downer on shiloh is her new haircut. Don't get me wrong, shiloh is an adorable little girl but the past couple years shilohs been looking like an adorable little boy. Now i've been thinking this to myself for quite awhile now,so I decided to type it in google and it turns out that this has been a big deal in the news. It even made the new york times. Recently angelina Jolie and Brad got Shiloh a haircut and she looks like this....
If I passed her on the street with no prior knowledge of who she was I would think she was a boy. She hasen't always been a tomboy though, as you can see in this picture...
In recent years Shiloh Jolie Pitt has been dressing more and more like a boy and the new haircut just took it to the next level. Now people are wondering if this could effect her longterm and she could become "gender confused". I'm a believer in the fact that people are born with a blank mind, and what you are taught and what you see is what you become. So if shiloh grows up in boy clothes, with a boy haircut, and wanting to be called "john" (brad pitt said this himself), then shes going to think that she is a boy named john. But if this whole john thing had never been taken seriously in the first place then maybe she would go by Shiloh, which is a really nice name. The early show had all kind of psycologists analyzing the whole thing and they said, its not biggie, let her express herself. Other people were saying tha that shes wearing her brothers hand-me downs (but come on people this is shiloh jolie pitt, her parents have enough money to buy every girl in africa louis vuittons. they can afford it). In touch magazine blamed the whole thing on angelina jolie, but I doubt she wants her sweet daughter to be a boy, because she dresses zahara as a girl. exhibit A....
the reality is simple though, shes just a four year old. What shes wearing is no big deal. Not all four year olds can be like Suri Cruise and what kind of world would this be if they are. It just was a big news story recently and I thought i'd cover it.
Song of the day: I don't wanna be (old one tree hill theme song) by Gavin Degraw. I thought this song was appropriate since shilohs just being who she wants.
quote of the day: “She only wants to be called John. John or Peter. So it’s a Peter Pan thing,” he says. “So we’ve got to call her John. ‘Shi, do you want …’ – ‘John. I’m John.’ And then I’ll say, ‘John, would you like some orange juice?’ And she goes, ‘No!’ So, you know, it’s just that kind of stuff that’s cute to parents, and it’s probably really obnoxious to other people.” -Brad Pitt
Newsflash of the day: Gary Coleman died at the age of 42 today. He was put on life support early this morning and his family had to pull the plug, and terminated his life. He had some brain, kidney, and other problems. May he R.I.P. forever and ever
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
"Every Thorn has its thorn/just like every night has its dawn/Just like every cowboy sings a sad sad song/Every rose has its thorn" -Bret michaels
Hey Readers! Guess what?
IT IS SUMMER 2010. My school year is officially over and I could not be happier about it. Its been a pretty fast, hard year and I celebrated by going downtown with the girls..and a couple of their boyfriends. It was a lot of fun. We all went to lunch at PepperJacks which has amazing food. Then after pepper Jacks we walked around and went to south park for a little while. It was nice. I found out that some of my friends are amazing tree climbers. We just had a good time filled with lots of laugh and I coulden't have asked for a better way to start my summer.
to be continued...
Ok so now i'm going to discus the amerian idol finale. OMGoodness!!! IT was so good. I absolutley loved it. My favortie moments would be, Pants on the ground, Bret Michaels showing up and killin' it on stage with Kassey, big Mikes performance, all the girls singing beautiful with christina aguleria, and Janet Jackson. But my all time favorite moment of the whole night is when all the idols from the past came together and sang together we are one. It was an amazing moment. All the previous winners were dressed in blacks, and all the contestants over the past were in white. It was just awesome. David Archuleta is still super adorable.
I almost cried though. Not because LEE DEWYZE won. I love lee and I'm glad hes our new champion, but because that was simon cowells last time on idol ever. They showed some of the funny things hes said over the years. The cute moments. It was spectacular. But the biggest honor was Paula abdul talking about him. I missed paula a LOT. After he was done talking paula went up and sat on simons lap. It was adorable because they were both all smiles. I wish simon and paula had been engaged instead of simon and that loser chick. From afar they looked in love and simon said, "I'm happy to have this little one around" in his british accent. They held hands and they were adorable. His goodbye speech was classy and it matches his personality but I will really really miss simon cowell.
Going back in time the janet jackson performance kind of creeped me out. It was really good and I'm a fan. Her performance was good with the green lights but her outfits were.....not cute. The first outfit made her look like a witch and the second catwoman outfit was hot but not on american idol. Thats more of a save it for your honeymoon kind of outfit. But what was the weirdest was while she was singing nothing she sounded EXACTLY like Michael jackson. Yes I know their related but she never sounded like him before. It was absolutly crazy. Check out the performance on youtube and see for yourself.
Bret Michaels apperence was also really cool and I finally realized what his song was. Hes the one who sand "every rose has its thorn". I'm gonna be cheesy and make that the song of the day due to his sickness
song of the day: Every Rose has its thorn
quote of the day: "There's a baby back there with Simon's haircut, and, honey, it's your turn to feed him." - Paula Abdul joking around with Simon and the audience on why she left American Idol
IT IS SUMMER 2010. My school year is officially over and I could not be happier about it. Its been a pretty fast, hard year and I celebrated by going downtown with the girls..and a couple of their boyfriends. It was a lot of fun. We all went to lunch at PepperJacks which has amazing food. Then after pepper Jacks we walked around and went to south park for a little while. It was nice. I found out that some of my friends are amazing tree climbers. We just had a good time filled with lots of laugh and I coulden't have asked for a better way to start my summer.
to be continued...
Ok so now i'm going to discus the amerian idol finale. OMGoodness!!! IT was so good. I absolutley loved it. My favortie moments would be, Pants on the ground, Bret Michaels showing up and killin' it on stage with Kassey, big Mikes performance, all the girls singing beautiful with christina aguleria, and Janet Jackson. But my all time favorite moment of the whole night is when all the idols from the past came together and sang together we are one. It was an amazing moment. All the previous winners were dressed in blacks, and all the contestants over the past were in white. It was just awesome. David Archuleta is still super adorable.
I almost cried though. Not because LEE DEWYZE won. I love lee and I'm glad hes our new champion, but because that was simon cowells last time on idol ever. They showed some of the funny things hes said over the years. The cute moments. It was spectacular. But the biggest honor was Paula abdul talking about him. I missed paula a LOT. After he was done talking paula went up and sat on simons lap. It was adorable because they were both all smiles. I wish simon and paula had been engaged instead of simon and that loser chick. From afar they looked in love and simon said, "I'm happy to have this little one around" in his british accent. They held hands and they were adorable. His goodbye speech was classy and it matches his personality but I will really really miss simon cowell.
Going back in time the janet jackson performance kind of creeped me out. It was really good and I'm a fan. Her performance was good with the green lights but her outfits were.....not cute. The first outfit made her look like a witch and the second catwoman outfit was hot but not on american idol. Thats more of a save it for your honeymoon kind of outfit. But what was the weirdest was while she was singing nothing she sounded EXACTLY like Michael jackson. Yes I know their related but she never sounded like him before. It was absolutly crazy. Check out the performance on youtube and see for yourself.
Bret Michaels apperence was also really cool and I finally realized what his song was. Hes the one who sand "every rose has its thorn". I'm gonna be cheesy and make that the song of the day due to his sickness
song of the day: Every Rose has its thorn
quote of the day: "There's a baby back there with Simon's haircut, and, honey, it's your turn to feed him." - Paula Abdul joking around with Simon and the audience on why she left American Idol
Monday, May 24, 2010
"Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavments even if it leads nowhere. Or would it be a waste even if I knew my place should I leave it"
Hi readers.
So about an hour ago I decided to let go of all those guys. And don't take me for a "fickle" teenager. I seriously want to try this but what I didn't realize was how sad it would make me and how empty I feel just an hour later. Its hard to let go of you biggest dream. What you want the most and idk why but my biggest dream happens to be a boy. But the problem is the boys biggest dream isen't me and its not easy watching someone you truley care for see right threw you. Its not easy at all and I thought that by giving up i'd be ending the pain. But the pain I have now is worse then the pain of being ignored or whatever. Its so difficult figuring out whats best for a person. But I just want the pain to go away period. I'm waiting for that lucas and peyton moment where everything just comes into place and her waiting for him pays off. What I need is answers. Should I hold down or should I just let go and find something or someone else for me. My problem can easily be described by the song Chasing Pavments. I'm wondering if I should give up or stay on the ride even if it leads nowhere. I need sort of sign or direction to figure out what I should do.
You can't force someone to like you, but you can give them no reason to hate you. I've done that. Tried my best to be a nice person and hoped that maybe he would see the same light that I see in him. But hes not seeing it and its so sad. Its sad that I can sit here all by self torn up about someone and wheather I should try and end my feelings for them when their out there somewhere thinking of anyone but me. Some would say the fact that its one way is reason enough to just stop and look for another guy. Maybe I need to stick too it and see through the pain to figure find the light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe after I end this bittersweet crush I'll realize that I'm better off without it. I just don't know. I have no clue.
song of the day: Chasing Pavments
So about an hour ago I decided to let go of all those guys. And don't take me for a "fickle" teenager. I seriously want to try this but what I didn't realize was how sad it would make me and how empty I feel just an hour later. Its hard to let go of you biggest dream. What you want the most and idk why but my biggest dream happens to be a boy. But the problem is the boys biggest dream isen't me and its not easy watching someone you truley care for see right threw you. Its not easy at all and I thought that by giving up i'd be ending the pain. But the pain I have now is worse then the pain of being ignored or whatever. Its so difficult figuring out whats best for a person. But I just want the pain to go away period. I'm waiting for that lucas and peyton moment where everything just comes into place and her waiting for him pays off. What I need is answers. Should I hold down or should I just let go and find something or someone else for me. My problem can easily be described by the song Chasing Pavments. I'm wondering if I should give up or stay on the ride even if it leads nowhere. I need sort of sign or direction to figure out what I should do.
You can't force someone to like you, but you can give them no reason to hate you. I've done that. Tried my best to be a nice person and hoped that maybe he would see the same light that I see in him. But hes not seeing it and its so sad. Its sad that I can sit here all by self torn up about someone and wheather I should try and end my feelings for them when their out there somewhere thinking of anyone but me. Some would say the fact that its one way is reason enough to just stop and look for another guy. Maybe I need to stick too it and see through the pain to figure find the light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe after I end this bittersweet crush I'll realize that I'm better off without it. I just don't know. I have no clue.
song of the day: Chasing Pavments
"Right now hes probably dancing w/a bleach blond tramp & shes probably getting frisky/Right now hes probably up behind her..."
Hey everyone!
I have big news about a change in my life. I am completly starting over. Forgetting all the boys of the past and moving on. Why? Because the truth is none of them have ever given me reason to care about them. I give give give and get nothing back. Whos it helping? Definatly not me because at the end of the day i'm the one hurt while they all go on living their happy lives with their slutty "Friends". So heres to looking for a nice boy. Not nice looking but a nice boy who gives a shit me about me. Because the ones I've been giving all my focas too probably don't care if i'm dead or alive and i'm done with that. Before I held on because it was all I knew, but now I realize that there are 3 billion guys out there who are just waiting to be loved. And who knows if it was meant to be maybe it will happen but I have officially let go of all those other guys.
Don't get me wrong. Their not monsters or anything, some other girl would be lucky to have them but i've just figured out that girl is not me. And I'm tired of wasting my time caring for people who don't feel the same way or who have a funny way of showing it. From now on my heart only goes to those who deserve it. The guy who sends cute emails, flirty texts, and dosen't complain about how much flowers cost. When that guy shows up at my door I'll be there to show them that their love and care is appriciated. I won't just ignore them because i'll realize that someone caring for you for just being you is something big. All though some people ignore it and don't understand that being loved is a privlage not a guarente someone out there does. And THATS the guy I want to end up with. THATS the guy I want to be thinking about. For now its just me and I don't mind it because someone out there is worth the wait.
song of the day: Before he cheats - Carrie underwood
quote of the day: (In my mind I imagine all those guys I wasted my time singing this). I'm only gonna break- break your break- break your heart. (they can check that off the list)
I have big news about a change in my life. I am completly starting over. Forgetting all the boys of the past and moving on. Why? Because the truth is none of them have ever given me reason to care about them. I give give give and get nothing back. Whos it helping? Definatly not me because at the end of the day i'm the one hurt while they all go on living their happy lives with their slutty "Friends". So heres to looking for a nice boy. Not nice looking but a nice boy who gives a shit me about me. Because the ones I've been giving all my focas too probably don't care if i'm dead or alive and i'm done with that. Before I held on because it was all I knew, but now I realize that there are 3 billion guys out there who are just waiting to be loved. And who knows if it was meant to be maybe it will happen but I have officially let go of all those other guys.
Don't get me wrong. Their not monsters or anything, some other girl would be lucky to have them but i've just figured out that girl is not me. And I'm tired of wasting my time caring for people who don't feel the same way or who have a funny way of showing it. From now on my heart only goes to those who deserve it. The guy who sends cute emails, flirty texts, and dosen't complain about how much flowers cost. When that guy shows up at my door I'll be there to show them that their love and care is appriciated. I won't just ignore them because i'll realize that someone caring for you for just being you is something big. All though some people ignore it and don't understand that being loved is a privlage not a guarente someone out there does. And THATS the guy I want to end up with. THATS the guy I want to be thinking about. For now its just me and I don't mind it because someone out there is worth the wait.
song of the day: Before he cheats - Carrie underwood
quote of the day: (In my mind I imagine all those guys I wasted my time singing this). I'm only gonna break- break your break- break your heart. (they can check that off the list)
"Girls just wanna have fun, oooh girls just wanna have fun" - Cyndi Lauper
Hi everyone!
How is everything? Guess what I did yesturday? I went to worlds of fun with my friends and I had a great time. Everyone needs to just spend time with their friens in a fun enviorment. Its amazing how it can brightan your mood. When I went to worlds of fun I rode everything, the patriot, the mamba, the boomarang, the prowler and many more. It was a lot of fun but eventually I got a litle sick of the rides. We were all there celebrating my friend Akiras sweet sixteen. the rides were fun and we all had lunch together. We plan to meet up again a couple times this week because its almost summer!! Tommorow is the last day of school. After tomorow i'm going to be a junior! does anyone else find this news super exciting. I got out of school at 12 today because we only went to school for finals. I also heard my results on the chamber audition as to how I did. It wasen't very good and I don't think i'll ever have a chance to make chamber, unless I get a teacher which is 100 dollars a month. I don't think its worth it since I don't plan on having a singing carreer
Another thing I realized through the drama saddness is 1. chamber choir is just a high shcool choir with talent and black dresses. It dosen't make or break my life. I also realized that I have a really good life. You know if you keep just living without really thinking about your life and the direction your headed you can't see the good that you have in your life right. I know some people have a crappy life wheather they see it or not and things are pretty good for me. Sometimes I think me and other people create unessicary problems for themselves. Except what you are and deal with it. Your life will seem a lot brighter if you do.
song of the day: Girls just wanna have fun
quote of the day: Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. - Bill Cosby
How is everything? Guess what I did yesturday? I went to worlds of fun with my friends and I had a great time. Everyone needs to just spend time with their friens in a fun enviorment. Its amazing how it can brightan your mood. When I went to worlds of fun I rode everything, the patriot, the mamba, the boomarang, the prowler and many more. It was a lot of fun but eventually I got a litle sick of the rides. We were all there celebrating my friend Akiras sweet sixteen. the rides were fun and we all had lunch together. We plan to meet up again a couple times this week because its almost summer!! Tommorow is the last day of school. After tomorow i'm going to be a junior! does anyone else find this news super exciting. I got out of school at 12 today because we only went to school for finals. I also heard my results on the chamber audition as to how I did. It wasen't very good and I don't think i'll ever have a chance to make chamber, unless I get a teacher which is 100 dollars a month. I don't think its worth it since I don't plan on having a singing carreer
Another thing I realized through the drama saddness is 1. chamber choir is just a high shcool choir with talent and black dresses. It dosen't make or break my life. I also realized that I have a really good life. You know if you keep just living without really thinking about your life and the direction your headed you can't see the good that you have in your life right. I know some people have a crappy life wheather they see it or not and things are pretty good for me. Sometimes I think me and other people create unessicary problems for themselves. Except what you are and deal with it. Your life will seem a lot brighter if you do.
song of the day: Girls just wanna have fun
quote of the day: Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. - Bill Cosby
Saturday, May 22, 2010
To- Do list
I figured i'd post my kind of to - do list for you guys to see and for me to look back on and see if I achieve it.
1. Master the guitar
2. Finish the book & get it pusblished
3. Meet either Ed westwick, taylor lautner, or Chad Michael Murray
4. Go to at least 20 concerts : one of wish must be a madonna concert
5. Date a guy whos related to the jacksons
6. Find my soulmate (fingers crossed i've already met him)
7. Convince said soulmate that we belong together and do the whole love confession thing.
8. Marry my soulmate
9. Have children and give them amazing names (cause names are everything, duh)
10. Travel the world (Italy, Dubai, and Greece in paticular)
11. Get more in touch with my african relatives
12. Speak Swahilli forever
13. Have the perfect wedding, this is crucil to sucsess
14. Graduate from High school followed by collage
15. Make it in chamber choir next year
16. Grow my hair out and have reallllly long hair
17. By a designer purse
18. Learn a british accent
19. Audition for American idol
20. Become a better christian
21. Find happiness along the way
22. Ride on the back of a motercycle
23. Be someone that would make my parents and others proud
24. Help someone who really needs it
25. Find confidence
26. Design my own house
27. Learn how to do the Thriller dance
28. Become really good at makeup
29. Learn how to cook italian food, because italian foods the best
30. Finish everything on the list
1. Master the guitar
2. Finish the book & get it pusblished
3. Meet either Ed westwick, taylor lautner, or Chad Michael Murray
4. Go to at least 20 concerts : one of wish must be a madonna concert
5. Date a guy whos related to the jacksons
6. Find my soulmate (fingers crossed i've already met him)
7. Convince said soulmate that we belong together and do the whole love confession thing.
8. Marry my soulmate
9. Have children and give them amazing names (cause names are everything, duh)
10. Travel the world (Italy, Dubai, and Greece in paticular)
11. Get more in touch with my african relatives
12. Speak Swahilli forever
13. Have the perfect wedding, this is crucil to sucsess
14. Graduate from High school followed by collage
15. Make it in chamber choir next year
16. Grow my hair out and have reallllly long hair
17. By a designer purse
18. Learn a british accent
19. Audition for American idol
20. Become a better christian
21. Find happiness along the way
22. Ride on the back of a motercycle
23. Be someone that would make my parents and others proud
24. Help someone who really needs it
25. Find confidence
26. Design my own house
27. Learn how to do the Thriller dance
28. Become really good at makeup
29. Learn how to cook italian food, because italian foods the best
30. Finish everything on the list
"Impossible for a plain yellow pumkin to become a goldan carrige/Impossible for a plain country bumpkin and a prince to join in marrige.."
Hey!
So the lyrics for today are from the movie Cinderella. No i'm not talking about disney's cinderella but Rodger and Hammerstiens cinderella. The celebs who acted in this movie are Brandy and Whitney Houstan. Brandy was cinderella and whitney was the fair god mother. Its actually a pretty good movie that can put a smile on your face. Technacally Brandy was the first black prinsess not tiana. Anyways the song is called impossible and they sing it at the very end where cinderella has here prince and its about how so many people think that things are impossible but reality nothing is possible if you believe and have a shred of hope.
Now don't get me wrong. I'm not crazy and I don't think that I have a fairy godmother whos just gonna come rescue me someday. But I do really think that nothings impossible. The things that are considered impossible are impossible because we as a human race made it that way. We invented all these little rules and walls to put around ourselves to protect us from our fears. The reality is "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself". I think thats a pretty fantastic quote and in the dream world I would have it written on my wall but thats kind of emo clique and tacky so I'll stick to my pink walls. Latley i've been thinking a lot about the American Dream, and fear. I've been thinking that when you live in america the american dream is very possible. But what holds peole back in life is being too scared.
I don't care how old the person is everyone gets scared. Some more often then others. I guess if I had to say what my biggest fears are I would say rejection, feeling alone, and snakes. The snake thing really isen't a problem because I don't run into them on a regular basis. Rejection is. There so much I don't do or say for fear of that rejection. Of being told that I am not good enough. Weather it be good enough to date someone, good enough to get a job, good enough to run for president. I don't like rejection. Its one of the saddest feelings in the world and ever time it happens I build bigger and bigger walls around myself. The deeper I get hidden in my walls the more the fear builds. Thats definatley a problem. I've gotten over the fear before because I figured that if I just put myself out there and let myself be vunerable then maybe I could reach what I want. It didn't really end up the way. It was just another wall built around me. This summer the goal is to break down the wall. Little by little because me and any of you who have the same problem are never gonna feel alive with so much fear. Life is too short to stop yourself from doing what you want because of stupid rules, and fear. Deep down inside you all know i'm right.
song of the day: Nothing on you - bruno mars
quote of the day: The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. Only the moment you reject all help are you freed. - Budda
Do not fear mistakes. You will know failure. Continue to reach out. - Benjammin Franklin
New celebrity Syle: If you've been paying attention to people magazine you all know about this horredous new style. Celebrities have been wearing dresses with their bras openly showing. The two that i've seen do it were Ashley Greene and Janet Jackson. With both of them its not like thier just not wearing tops. Janets dress had a see through material on top where as ashley greee was showing the side of her bra. Its really weird.
So the lyrics for today are from the movie Cinderella. No i'm not talking about disney's cinderella but Rodger and Hammerstiens cinderella. The celebs who acted in this movie are Brandy and Whitney Houstan. Brandy was cinderella and whitney was the fair god mother. Its actually a pretty good movie that can put a smile on your face. Technacally Brandy was the first black prinsess not tiana. Anyways the song is called impossible and they sing it at the very end where cinderella has here prince and its about how so many people think that things are impossible but reality nothing is possible if you believe and have a shred of hope.
Now don't get me wrong. I'm not crazy and I don't think that I have a fairy godmother whos just gonna come rescue me someday. But I do really think that nothings impossible. The things that are considered impossible are impossible because we as a human race made it that way. We invented all these little rules and walls to put around ourselves to protect us from our fears. The reality is "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself". I think thats a pretty fantastic quote and in the dream world I would have it written on my wall but thats kind of emo clique and tacky so I'll stick to my pink walls. Latley i've been thinking a lot about the American Dream, and fear. I've been thinking that when you live in america the american dream is very possible. But what holds peole back in life is being too scared.
I don't care how old the person is everyone gets scared. Some more often then others. I guess if I had to say what my biggest fears are I would say rejection, feeling alone, and snakes. The snake thing really isen't a problem because I don't run into them on a regular basis. Rejection is. There so much I don't do or say for fear of that rejection. Of being told that I am not good enough. Weather it be good enough to date someone, good enough to get a job, good enough to run for president. I don't like rejection. Its one of the saddest feelings in the world and ever time it happens I build bigger and bigger walls around myself. The deeper I get hidden in my walls the more the fear builds. Thats definatley a problem. I've gotten over the fear before because I figured that if I just put myself out there and let myself be vunerable then maybe I could reach what I want. It didn't really end up the way. It was just another wall built around me. This summer the goal is to break down the wall. Little by little because me and any of you who have the same problem are never gonna feel alive with so much fear. Life is too short to stop yourself from doing what you want because of stupid rules, and fear. Deep down inside you all know i'm right.
song of the day: Nothing on you - bruno mars
quote of the day: The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. Only the moment you reject all help are you freed. - Budda
Do not fear mistakes. You will know failure. Continue to reach out. - Benjammin Franklin
New celebrity Syle: If you've been paying attention to people magazine you all know about this horredous new style. Celebrities have been wearing dresses with their bras openly showing. The two that i've seen do it were Ashley Greene and Janet Jackson. With both of them its not like thier just not wearing tops. Janets dress had a see through material on top where as ashley greee was showing the side of her bra. Its really weird.
Friday, May 21, 2010
"Lost and insecure, you found me, you found me/ Lyin' on the floor, surrounded, surrounded/Just a little late, you found me, you found me..."
Hey readers!
You all should know this but just in case you don't the lyrics today are from the song you found me by the Fray. Its a pretty good song and I like the fray. I'm the in the "the fray" type of mood. The chamber choir list got posted today. I wasen't on it. It was a little dissapointing but the people who did make it were all the sculpted perfect people who take private lessons 3 times a week. All the people who just have choir expirence in school didn't make it. I'm glad that i'm not as depressed as I thought i'd be. I love choir, and I have a good teacher so we're going to sound good whatever choir we're in I just wanted to be the best you know? Is it wrong to want to be the best at something? To be better than whats expected?
I'm glad I didn't get too upset over the whole chamber thing. If you know me well, than you know I don't get that upset often. I've known people for 10 years and they've never seen me yell or cry. I guess i'm an emotionally stable person but when things go wrong they stick with me forever. Its so weird. I can think of 3 insidents so far this year that have upset me and they're all so stupid. Its mostly 3 insidents where I embarassed myself at school or in public. Sometimes I think I might try to hard to be the best. Weather it be education wise, or clothing wise. I guess i'm just looking for that something to boost my confidence and make me feel sepcial. Maybe i'm just looking for someone to find me. To see some kind of light in me. High school is a time for self descoveries but I feel like i'm confused on who me really is. I'm undefinable.
Today i'm going to give you a good person leson. No, I don't think i'm the best person in the universe or anything its just that someone brough these things up to my attention and people slip off on this a lot. A lot of people give the word "retarded" a negative conontation. As in when someone makes a mistake they say something like "dude, thats retarded". Its mostley a problem guys have but when you think about it its a little insensitive. To people who are special and to the person your saying it too. Give it a second thought before you say it. Oh and another thing is when people say somethings gay or say the whole "no homo" thing. I'm not defending gay people or anything (sorry if that offended anyone) but I just think that if you want to complement someone of your own gender you should be able to do it without having to explain yourself. Why not say you like your friends outfit. Why do people feel the need to add "no homo" to that kind of thing. Its not the end of the world if one of you says it, but I think you should be confident enough in your own skin and orientation to not have to say that.
song of the day: You found me - the fray
quote of the day: Experience is not what happens to you; it's what you do with what happens to you.
You all should know this but just in case you don't the lyrics today are from the song you found me by the Fray. Its a pretty good song and I like the fray. I'm the in the "the fray" type of mood. The chamber choir list got posted today. I wasen't on it. It was a little dissapointing but the people who did make it were all the sculpted perfect people who take private lessons 3 times a week. All the people who just have choir expirence in school didn't make it. I'm glad that i'm not as depressed as I thought i'd be. I love choir, and I have a good teacher so we're going to sound good whatever choir we're in I just wanted to be the best you know? Is it wrong to want to be the best at something? To be better than whats expected?
I'm glad I didn't get too upset over the whole chamber thing. If you know me well, than you know I don't get that upset often. I've known people for 10 years and they've never seen me yell or cry. I guess i'm an emotionally stable person but when things go wrong they stick with me forever. Its so weird. I can think of 3 insidents so far this year that have upset me and they're all so stupid. Its mostly 3 insidents where I embarassed myself at school or in public. Sometimes I think I might try to hard to be the best. Weather it be education wise, or clothing wise. I guess i'm just looking for that something to boost my confidence and make me feel sepcial. Maybe i'm just looking for someone to find me. To see some kind of light in me. High school is a time for self descoveries but I feel like i'm confused on who me really is. I'm undefinable.
Today i'm going to give you a good person leson. No, I don't think i'm the best person in the universe or anything its just that someone brough these things up to my attention and people slip off on this a lot. A lot of people give the word "retarded" a negative conontation. As in when someone makes a mistake they say something like "dude, thats retarded". Its mostley a problem guys have but when you think about it its a little insensitive. To people who are special and to the person your saying it too. Give it a second thought before you say it. Oh and another thing is when people say somethings gay or say the whole "no homo" thing. I'm not defending gay people or anything (sorry if that offended anyone) but I just think that if you want to complement someone of your own gender you should be able to do it without having to explain yourself. Why not say you like your friends outfit. Why do people feel the need to add "no homo" to that kind of thing. Its not the end of the world if one of you says it, but I think you should be confident enough in your own skin and orientation to not have to say that.
song of the day: You found me - the fray
quote of the day: Experience is not what happens to you; it's what you do with what happens to you.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
"We only got 86 400 seconds in a day to turn it all around or throw it all away/We got to tell em' that we love em' while we got the chance to say..."
Hey!
So guess what? I was just thinking about life. I know thats being a little overdramatic but I was on the bus and someone was talking about how they contemplated suicide. I don't think i've ever wanted to kill myself but when I think about life, my life in paticular I think of a lot of things I want to do that I don't. Its a little annoying because I'm just not as confident as I need to be to do some of things I want to do. Latley it feels like i've been spending my days thinking about May 26th. The first day of summer. But when you think about it that a lot of time that i'm wasting. Each day has 24 hours in it, and woulden't it be great that each of those hours were spent doing something you love with the people you love? But the world we live in is so complicated.
I have a mind full of someday thoughts. Someday I will travel to the places I want to see. Someday I will finally get serious and learn how to play my guitar like the greats. Someday I'll be able to just walk up to someone and tell them what I truley think, tell it how it is. Everybody has their tommorows that keep getting pushed and pushed. What is that keeps people, well me at least pushing these things back? Its fear. Fear that maybe if the oppurtunity for that someday comes it won't be everything I wanted it to be. Fear of being laughed at or being made fun of. Living a life through fear isen't taking full advantage of the gift of life. But the question I have is how do you get past the fear and just start living?
song of the day: Live like we're dying - Chris Allen
quote of the day: Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today
So guess what? I was just thinking about life. I know thats being a little overdramatic but I was on the bus and someone was talking about how they contemplated suicide. I don't think i've ever wanted to kill myself but when I think about life, my life in paticular I think of a lot of things I want to do that I don't. Its a little annoying because I'm just not as confident as I need to be to do some of things I want to do. Latley it feels like i've been spending my days thinking about May 26th. The first day of summer. But when you think about it that a lot of time that i'm wasting. Each day has 24 hours in it, and woulden't it be great that each of those hours were spent doing something you love with the people you love? But the world we live in is so complicated.
I have a mind full of someday thoughts. Someday I will travel to the places I want to see. Someday I will finally get serious and learn how to play my guitar like the greats. Someday I'll be able to just walk up to someone and tell them what I truley think, tell it how it is. Everybody has their tommorows that keep getting pushed and pushed. What is that keeps people, well me at least pushing these things back? Its fear. Fear that maybe if the oppurtunity for that someday comes it won't be everything I wanted it to be. Fear of being laughed at or being made fun of. Living a life through fear isen't taking full advantage of the gift of life. But the question I have is how do you get past the fear and just start living?
song of the day: Live like we're dying - Chris Allen
quote of the day: Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Gossip Girl: The love of my life
Hello, the tittle of the day is true. Gossip Girl is the love of my life. I am obsessed with it. The characters and story line are just amazing. Guess who agrees? Lauren Conrad, Tyra banks and many more. Yesturdays episode deserves a whole blog of its own. This is how my mind went through the whole episode, Omg, OMg, OMG, OMFG, AHHH, OMMFG, AHHHHHHHHHHHH! Does that make any sense? It got more and more and more and more intesne as time went on.
Did you miss it? Heres what happened..
The episode began with breakfast at Blairs house and Dorota was really pregnant. She coulden't lean over for miss blairs tea so blair helped her. The clock was ticking and Blair only had a little while to meet chucks deadline. The clock was ticking and he was at the top of the empire state building with pink roses waiting for his love. Blair went on a date with this other guy because she wanted her mind off chuck. Meanwhile, Dan and Serena were in bed together. Nope not what you think readers they didn't have sex but they did cheat on their significant others. Who are their significant others Nate and Vanessa.
Vanessa was in Haiti but Nate was at Chucks pad (where he now lives) with Jenny. No worries they slept in diffrent rooms with no contact. Eventually Blair figures out hse needs chuck but right when shes about to go Dorottas water breaks. They have to rush to the hospital and Darottas pushing when she turns to Blair and says " miss blair you have to go get Mr. Chuck, I will be fine". Blair runs in a taxi and gets to the top of the empire state building but too late, chuck is gone. Chuck is back at his apartment doing his best to close his heart to Blair by using his two best friends. Mr. Taquilla and Mr. Vodka. He was drinking it up when Jenny shows up. Shes also depressed because she realizes no one likes her (because shes a little biotch duh! She totally posted a picture of Dan and Serena together on gossip girl! Totally not cool because their step siblings and all the readers are like "insesttttt"). Anyways Jenny walks in and Chuck offers her some of his buddies (the alcahol) and they get drunk together. Its getting Dark when Chcuk says "If you would like to leave now would be the time...". She dosen't so chuck and jenny kiss followed by sex, chuck taking Jennys virginaty (theres officially only one virgin left on gossip girl and hes gay so its not happening...)
As their finishing up Blair enters the home with the key from when they were still dating. chuck is overjoyed to see her and does his best to get Jenny out (who needs the biotch when his princess has arrived). Jenny manages to make a quick exit and chuck dosen't get caught until Dan punches him in from of blair. Theres a moment of realization and Blair closes her heart to chuck. He blew it...again. Nate and Serena break up when they see the gossip girl blast. Jenny gets sent away to her moms house (hopefully never to come back). Georgina shows up with news; SHES PREGNANT! with dans baby...or so she says... Ofcourse she shows up right when Dan decides he loves serena but its too late because Blair and Serena have gone off too Paris together for the summer to enjoy their new singlness.
Chuck went off to proge to heal his wounds leaving Nate his little back book. Nate is healing with the help of some prostitues :/ Then the big finally is chuck walking down the street ring in hand (he had planned on proposing to blair) and these robbers grab him. Chucks not worried he has lots of money he dosen't mind loosing some. The guys don't want to hear it they want the ring. Chuck goes "NO! Anything but the ring...its all I have left of her (AWWWW MR. CHUCK)". Right when he says this the robber pulls out a gun, pulls the trigger and chuck bass is shot, posssibly dead on a street all alone in progue. This is when OMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMGGGGGG comes in because my love, chuck bass is possibly dead. Noing t.v. shows though he can't be dead. Hes a main character. But i'm hoping season 3 will be used with blair coming to his side.
And thats what you missed on GOSSIP GIRL!
sorry if that bored you to death but you got to admit its intresting
Did you miss it? Heres what happened..
The episode began with breakfast at Blairs house and Dorota was really pregnant. She coulden't lean over for miss blairs tea so blair helped her. The clock was ticking and Blair only had a little while to meet chucks deadline. The clock was ticking and he was at the top of the empire state building with pink roses waiting for his love. Blair went on a date with this other guy because she wanted her mind off chuck. Meanwhile, Dan and Serena were in bed together. Nope not what you think readers they didn't have sex but they did cheat on their significant others. Who are their significant others Nate and Vanessa.
Vanessa was in Haiti but Nate was at Chucks pad (where he now lives) with Jenny. No worries they slept in diffrent rooms with no contact. Eventually Blair figures out hse needs chuck but right when shes about to go Dorottas water breaks. They have to rush to the hospital and Darottas pushing when she turns to Blair and says " miss blair you have to go get Mr. Chuck, I will be fine". Blair runs in a taxi and gets to the top of the empire state building but too late, chuck is gone. Chuck is back at his apartment doing his best to close his heart to Blair by using his two best friends. Mr. Taquilla and Mr. Vodka. He was drinking it up when Jenny shows up. Shes also depressed because she realizes no one likes her (because shes a little biotch duh! She totally posted a picture of Dan and Serena together on gossip girl! Totally not cool because their step siblings and all the readers are like "insesttttt"). Anyways Jenny walks in and Chuck offers her some of his buddies (the alcahol) and they get drunk together. Its getting Dark when Chcuk says "If you would like to leave now would be the time...". She dosen't so chuck and jenny kiss followed by sex, chuck taking Jennys virginaty (theres officially only one virgin left on gossip girl and hes gay so its not happening...)
As their finishing up Blair enters the home with the key from when they were still dating. chuck is overjoyed to see her and does his best to get Jenny out (who needs the biotch when his princess has arrived). Jenny manages to make a quick exit and chuck dosen't get caught until Dan punches him in from of blair. Theres a moment of realization and Blair closes her heart to chuck. He blew it...again. Nate and Serena break up when they see the gossip girl blast. Jenny gets sent away to her moms house (hopefully never to come back). Georgina shows up with news; SHES PREGNANT! with dans baby...or so she says... Ofcourse she shows up right when Dan decides he loves serena but its too late because Blair and Serena have gone off too Paris together for the summer to enjoy their new singlness.
Chuck went off to proge to heal his wounds leaving Nate his little back book. Nate is healing with the help of some prostitues :/ Then the big finally is chuck walking down the street ring in hand (he had planned on proposing to blair) and these robbers grab him. Chucks not worried he has lots of money he dosen't mind loosing some. The guys don't want to hear it they want the ring. Chuck goes "NO! Anything but the ring...its all I have left of her (AWWWW MR. CHUCK)". Right when he says this the robber pulls out a gun, pulls the trigger and chuck bass is shot, posssibly dead on a street all alone in progue. This is when OMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMGGGGGG comes in because my love, chuck bass is possibly dead. Noing t.v. shows though he can't be dead. Hes a main character. But i'm hoping season 3 will be used with blair coming to his side.
And thats what you missed on GOSSIP GIRL!
sorry if that bored you to death but you got to admit its intresting
"We can go nowhere but up from here my dear/Baby we can go nowhere but up/tell me what we've got to fear/we can take it to the sky past the moon.."
Hi everyone!
The song of the day is one of my favorites. It's up by justin bieber. I love that song its so sweet. I'm currently in the procsess of trying to see him live but its not working out to my favor. Its on a day that my mom is working and the chances are pretty slim. I just have a thing for male musicians. Its just so attractive. Yes i'm saying Justin Biebers cute, but i'm also saying hes talented and I realllllllly want to go to a concert again. I love concerts. Anyways enough of me being all whinny.
So remember when I just said I like musicians? haha. I can't stop thinking about this guy... Its really unlike anything i've ever felt. I constantly think about him and when I try to stop it just dosen't work. The littlest things remind me about him and it still just feels right. The realistic thing that my friends say sometimes is "is too good to be true". Like maybe in my mind this idea of my and mr. musician is way better then it could ever even be. I don't know, but what I do know is that if you feel something really strongly you shoulden't just let it go because theres a reason your feeling it. Is he feeling it? I don't think so. I don't even know how to know if hes thinking that because i'm not a good mind reader. I'm good at evaluating people, well everyone but the people that count. Looks like i'm in another epic swoon.
Ok speaking of love, not that i'm calling it love...anyways my parents know this couple that have been married for 20 years, but have liked in completly diffrent countries for 14 years. I know right! They haven't seen each other for about as long as I've lived and just reading through the blogs i've been writting in the last year seems like a lot because just like all people I change. Anyways after 14 years she finally got a visa to come to america (without her child with said husband) and they get to reuinite. Now a thought thats in the back of my mind is that, I don't think it will work. 14 years its like seeing a stranger. Now they talk on the phone a lot of and stuff but do you think the flame can last?? I'm a true believer in distance makes the heart grow fonder but 14 years??? If things work out for them it will be living proof of the whole soulmate thing because that means nothing can effect the true flame between people. another thought I have is that they haven't had sex in 14 years.....Thats a lot for adults.
Ok so not to gross you out or anthing but have you heard of OMG facts? They have the most intresting bits and pieces of information. I get mine on twitter but anyways teh fact today was that American people have sex an average of 118 times a year. This is below the world average?? And people say amerians are slutty.. anyways the countries that have the least sexual activity are Malasia, Singapore, and sweedon. I guess it makes sense because i've never heard anyone be like "sexy singaporian". haha. Sorry I just thought it was intresting and we talked about it in computer apps.
song of the day: Up - Justin Bieber (an intresting fact of his is that on twitter his followers call themselves the beiblievers as in belivers with bieber in it. I thought it was cute. It made me wonder what people would call me if I ever became a teen sensation)
quote of the day: From Sucsess you get a lot of things but not that great inside thing that love brings you
The song of the day is one of my favorites. It's up by justin bieber. I love that song its so sweet. I'm currently in the procsess of trying to see him live but its not working out to my favor. Its on a day that my mom is working and the chances are pretty slim. I just have a thing for male musicians. Its just so attractive. Yes i'm saying Justin Biebers cute, but i'm also saying hes talented and I realllllllly want to go to a concert again. I love concerts. Anyways enough of me being all whinny.
So remember when I just said I like musicians? haha. I can't stop thinking about this guy... Its really unlike anything i've ever felt. I constantly think about him and when I try to stop it just dosen't work. The littlest things remind me about him and it still just feels right. The realistic thing that my friends say sometimes is "is too good to be true". Like maybe in my mind this idea of my and mr. musician is way better then it could ever even be. I don't know, but what I do know is that if you feel something really strongly you shoulden't just let it go because theres a reason your feeling it. Is he feeling it? I don't think so. I don't even know how to know if hes thinking that because i'm not a good mind reader. I'm good at evaluating people, well everyone but the people that count. Looks like i'm in another epic swoon.
Ok speaking of love, not that i'm calling it love...anyways my parents know this couple that have been married for 20 years, but have liked in completly diffrent countries for 14 years. I know right! They haven't seen each other for about as long as I've lived and just reading through the blogs i've been writting in the last year seems like a lot because just like all people I change. Anyways after 14 years she finally got a visa to come to america (without her child with said husband) and they get to reuinite. Now a thought thats in the back of my mind is that, I don't think it will work. 14 years its like seeing a stranger. Now they talk on the phone a lot of and stuff but do you think the flame can last?? I'm a true believer in distance makes the heart grow fonder but 14 years??? If things work out for them it will be living proof of the whole soulmate thing because that means nothing can effect the true flame between people. another thought I have is that they haven't had sex in 14 years.....Thats a lot for adults.
Ok so not to gross you out or anthing but have you heard of OMG facts? They have the most intresting bits and pieces of information. I get mine on twitter but anyways teh fact today was that American people have sex an average of 118 times a year. This is below the world average?? And people say amerians are slutty.. anyways the countries that have the least sexual activity are Malasia, Singapore, and sweedon. I guess it makes sense because i've never heard anyone be like "sexy singaporian". haha. Sorry I just thought it was intresting and we talked about it in computer apps.
song of the day: Up - Justin Bieber (an intresting fact of his is that on twitter his followers call themselves the beiblievers as in belivers with bieber in it. I thought it was cute. It made me wonder what people would call me if I ever became a teen sensation)
quote of the day: From Sucsess you get a lot of things but not that great inside thing that love brings you
"We're just ordinary people/We don't know which way to go/Cuz we're ordinary people/Maybe we should take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)"
Hey Readers!
The lyrics above are too a pretty good song that would be considered "old" to some of you. I think it came out in like 2006 *gasp*. Its a really good song, with an amazing piano part. For those of you who kind of like the slow more calm music, you'd like this. John Legend has a pretty good voice, AND hes been to Zanzibar, Tanzania. Which puts him in the cool club that few of us are in. He even recorded a video at the church my parents grew up at! Too bad no one over there knew who he was.... I know it sounds like the weirdest thing even to not know who John Legend is but thats really normal in third world countrys. Thats why their called third world, because their way further behind then where the rest of the world is. I mean meantion Stevie Wonder or Michael Jackson and they'll know him but its hard to get new music info when you can barley afford a meal. Its sad. I'm very thankful for living in an advanced country.
Today was my chamber choir rehersal. What is chamber choir you ask? Chamber choir is the choir of the 64 best voices Freestate High School has too offer. I know you think that 64 is a lot but there are 300 people total in the choir concert, 200 of them being women. Its difficult to get a spot as a girl. I was suprisingly calm before my audition but when I finally walked in, I got nervous. I sang through my song really well but what happened was I bombed my sight singing and a little bit of rythems. My teacher was nice and compared my voice and personality to a senior that was in chamber choir (good sign) BUT she said that I need to open up more when I sing which I agree with I just don't know how too. It overall went really well but as in all my auditions it ended with "your good but you need to be more confident". I think that means womens choir for mariam. Its not that bad i'm just dissapointed in myself.
On a more posative note I have 5 more days till summer vacation :)
song of the day: Ordinary people - John Legend
Quote of the day: Every charitable act is a stepping stone toward heaven.
The lyrics above are too a pretty good song that would be considered "old" to some of you. I think it came out in like 2006 *gasp*. Its a really good song, with an amazing piano part. For those of you who kind of like the slow more calm music, you'd like this. John Legend has a pretty good voice, AND hes been to Zanzibar, Tanzania. Which puts him in the cool club that few of us are in. He even recorded a video at the church my parents grew up at! Too bad no one over there knew who he was.... I know it sounds like the weirdest thing even to not know who John Legend is but thats really normal in third world countrys. Thats why their called third world, because their way further behind then where the rest of the world is. I mean meantion Stevie Wonder or Michael Jackson and they'll know him but its hard to get new music info when you can barley afford a meal. Its sad. I'm very thankful for living in an advanced country.
Today was my chamber choir rehersal. What is chamber choir you ask? Chamber choir is the choir of the 64 best voices Freestate High School has too offer. I know you think that 64 is a lot but there are 300 people total in the choir concert, 200 of them being women. Its difficult to get a spot as a girl. I was suprisingly calm before my audition but when I finally walked in, I got nervous. I sang through my song really well but what happened was I bombed my sight singing and a little bit of rythems. My teacher was nice and compared my voice and personality to a senior that was in chamber choir (good sign) BUT she said that I need to open up more when I sing which I agree with I just don't know how too. It overall went really well but as in all my auditions it ended with "your good but you need to be more confident". I think that means womens choir for mariam. Its not that bad i'm just dissapointed in myself.
On a more posative note I have 5 more days till summer vacation :)
song of the day: Ordinary people - John Legend
Quote of the day: Every charitable act is a stepping stone toward heaven.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Blast from the past: Flower girl career
We haven't had a blast from the past in a couple weeks. This week I had a plan but sidetracked again. My first ever important job was being a flower girl. I remember the first time I was given the oppurtunity. I was 4 years old and my mom told me I will be a flower girl and my cousin Bill would be a ring bearer. We kind of ignored our parents about it and kept on playing inspector gadget. That was our favorite game back then. In those days both bill and I were only children so we spent a lot of time together. Our parents would go out to weddings or go to party's and me and bill would get to hang out with whoever was babysitting us playing games. Bill and I went to a lot of weddings back in the day but this on was special because we had in important job.
Time passed and I was trying on flower girl dresses and buying new shoes. Eventually the day of the wedding came. My mom helped me get in my dress and put my hair in a poof pony tail. I also had this little flowery headpiece. My aunt Glory sewed some fake flowers into a basket, because I wasen't actually going to throw any flowers.Once I was dressed and ready my dad drove me to the home of the bride where they did my makeup. It was my first time having eye liner and lipstick on. I felt really cute. When we got to the door of the reception this african music was playing and Bill had just gotten over the chicken pox. He still had the red splotches on his face and was itchy but for the sake of the camaras he was told not to itch. We walked in with the bridal party and my dad being the m.c. teased us into the microphone. We stood up in front of everyone and took lots of pictures. All in all it was a fun day.
Around 2004 I got lucky again and was offered a flower girl position. This time the bride ordered dresses from California for me and my friend inti to wear. There was no ring berrar for this wedding so my and inti were each required to cary the rings in our baskets. We practiced for about an our walking in step together to the music. we all got our hair done with the bride and got to ride to the reception. That was the first time I ever got my hair straightened. It looked great. It was a fun, this time there was a mini dissaster. I dropped the ring. It was awful, but good thing I saw it before time to give the bride and groom the rings. No one knew that there was ever a problem, I saved the day!
Here are some pictures of the events. Were any of you ever flower girls?
I have a ton more pictures but I currently don't have a scanner :'(. You can immagine it.
Time passed and I was trying on flower girl dresses and buying new shoes. Eventually the day of the wedding came. My mom helped me get in my dress and put my hair in a poof pony tail. I also had this little flowery headpiece. My aunt Glory sewed some fake flowers into a basket, because I wasen't actually going to throw any flowers.Once I was dressed and ready my dad drove me to the home of the bride where they did my makeup. It was my first time having eye liner and lipstick on. I felt really cute. When we got to the door of the reception this african music was playing and Bill had just gotten over the chicken pox. He still had the red splotches on his face and was itchy but for the sake of the camaras he was told not to itch. We walked in with the bridal party and my dad being the m.c. teased us into the microphone. We stood up in front of everyone and took lots of pictures. All in all it was a fun day.
Around 2004 I got lucky again and was offered a flower girl position. This time the bride ordered dresses from California for me and my friend inti to wear. There was no ring berrar for this wedding so my and inti were each required to cary the rings in our baskets. We practiced for about an our walking in step together to the music. we all got our hair done with the bride and got to ride to the reception. That was the first time I ever got my hair straightened. It looked great. It was a fun, this time there was a mini dissaster. I dropped the ring. It was awful, but good thing I saw it before time to give the bride and groom the rings. No one knew that there was ever a problem, I saved the day!
Here are some pictures of the events. Were any of you ever flower girls?
I have a ton more pictures but I currently don't have a scanner :'(. You can immagine it.
"California girls we're undeniable/Fine Fresh Fierce we got it on lock"
Hello!
Good news and bad news. Find your love has been replaced in my heart by a couple new awesome songs but i'm saving one of them for tommorow. Have any of you heard Katy Perry's new song California gurls. I love it! :) Katy perrys songs are always so fun and upbeat. They put me in a good mood. But find your love is still good. This morning was relativley exciting for my boring life. I woke up, had pancakes, and went to church. It was a pretty exciting day there because the pasters wife finally moved out here which is great. Then I went to borders after church to waste time. There are so many books I want to read. Books are really expensive though, its sad. Yesturday I went to Cirque de sole. Its a famous group that travels and I didn't realize they would be speaking all spanish. I went with some people from church, it wasen't a christian circus or anything the people from church were just hoping we'd get some kind of message out of it. I didn't get the message but the people were really talented. I love trapeeze stuff. I wish I could do it. If I ever become famous and go on tour i'm adding trapeeze people to my show.
Back to california girls. I love the song and I feel like maybe she got the idea after Empire state of mine came out. Its cool that theirs some songs representing the east coast and the west coast. When I hear that song it makes me think I want to be a california girl. Instead of a boring kansas girl. The good thing about living in america is that the dream can happen hear. Arnold Swartzinager actually spoke at my pasters daughters graduationa and he told them about the keys to sucsess. Number one was get to America. You know those of us who are already hear take it for granted that a majority of us will be soemthing some day. That more of us have jobs then those that don't. In America you can be nothing then suddenly be something. A great example of that are our rappers....
Today i'm gonna take some time to talk about rappers. Now we all know them. The big names are kanye west, lil wayne, Drake, T-pain, T.I., eminem and probably someone else i'm forgetting. I like rap Something really good about rappers that people don't realize is that their the best example of the american dream. Basically all the rappers out there started out poor, in jail, or as drug dealers. Yesturday on Larry King Live (good show people, good show) T.I. was on. Lary King did a great interview on him. Something about T.I. that I always forget is how hot he is. I know that sounds stupid but I ever forget that he is really attractive until I see him on television or on a music video. But one thing I never did realize about him was his story and his intelligence. This was T.I.'s first interview since he went to jail and he was suprisingly honest. He said he started dealing drugs when he was 15 years old. He had a rough childhood, his dad having him when he was 50. In 2002 his father passed away. T.I. is only 29 years old right now but the life he's lived makes him years older.
He went to jail for a year and a day for gun possesion. He was honest about jail and said he didn't get any special treatment. His treatment was worse, because the jail people tried so hard not to give him better treatment. He said that fellow in mates treated him as a man not a celebirity to that wasen't a problem. And his job in the jail was custodian from 8:30 - 9:30 am. He admitted to his jail expirence and spoke about it intelligently. That suprised me. By intelligently I mean he didn't sound ghetto. When he raps T.I. dosen't sound like a diplomat but he interviews he does and tahts the kind of thing I like. He also spoke about Tameka a.k.a "tiny". He said hes really proud of her not for her proffessional achievments but the fact that shes a good mom. He has two kids with her and considers her oldest daughter his. Larry said something about him having 5 kids and he corrected his saying I have six "I count Mo'nique'nique as my own". That was really sweet.
He says hes a changed man and we'll wait to see. When there was only a minute left larry was joking around about them rapping together then T.I. was like "wheneva you want to just holla at ur boy" or something like that then larry being over 70 didn't understand and was like "pardon". It was funny but then T.I. said, "Mr. Larry, whenver you would like to record and album with me just holla- I mean let me know". IT was really funny to me.
Sorry this is so long people. too much to say
song of the day: California gurls - Katy Perry "CALIRFORNIA GIRLS WE'RE UNFORGETTABLE!" :)
quote of the day: Love creates an "us" withougt destroying a 'me'
Good news and bad news. Find your love has been replaced in my heart by a couple new awesome songs but i'm saving one of them for tommorow. Have any of you heard Katy Perry's new song California gurls. I love it! :) Katy perrys songs are always so fun and upbeat. They put me in a good mood. But find your love is still good. This morning was relativley exciting for my boring life. I woke up, had pancakes, and went to church. It was a pretty exciting day there because the pasters wife finally moved out here which is great. Then I went to borders after church to waste time. There are so many books I want to read. Books are really expensive though, its sad. Yesturday I went to Cirque de sole. Its a famous group that travels and I didn't realize they would be speaking all spanish. I went with some people from church, it wasen't a christian circus or anything the people from church were just hoping we'd get some kind of message out of it. I didn't get the message but the people were really talented. I love trapeeze stuff. I wish I could do it. If I ever become famous and go on tour i'm adding trapeeze people to my show.
Back to california girls. I love the song and I feel like maybe she got the idea after Empire state of mine came out. Its cool that theirs some songs representing the east coast and the west coast. When I hear that song it makes me think I want to be a california girl. Instead of a boring kansas girl. The good thing about living in america is that the dream can happen hear. Arnold Swartzinager actually spoke at my pasters daughters graduationa and he told them about the keys to sucsess. Number one was get to America. You know those of us who are already hear take it for granted that a majority of us will be soemthing some day. That more of us have jobs then those that don't. In America you can be nothing then suddenly be something. A great example of that are our rappers....
Today i'm gonna take some time to talk about rappers. Now we all know them. The big names are kanye west, lil wayne, Drake, T-pain, T.I., eminem and probably someone else i'm forgetting. I like rap Something really good about rappers that people don't realize is that their the best example of the american dream. Basically all the rappers out there started out poor, in jail, or as drug dealers. Yesturday on Larry King Live (good show people, good show) T.I. was on. Lary King did a great interview on him. Something about T.I. that I always forget is how hot he is. I know that sounds stupid but I ever forget that he is really attractive until I see him on television or on a music video. But one thing I never did realize about him was his story and his intelligence. This was T.I.'s first interview since he went to jail and he was suprisingly honest. He said he started dealing drugs when he was 15 years old. He had a rough childhood, his dad having him when he was 50. In 2002 his father passed away. T.I. is only 29 years old right now but the life he's lived makes him years older.
He went to jail for a year and a day for gun possesion. He was honest about jail and said he didn't get any special treatment. His treatment was worse, because the jail people tried so hard not to give him better treatment. He said that fellow in mates treated him as a man not a celebirity to that wasen't a problem. And his job in the jail was custodian from 8:30 - 9:30 am. He admitted to his jail expirence and spoke about it intelligently. That suprised me. By intelligently I mean he didn't sound ghetto. When he raps T.I. dosen't sound like a diplomat but he interviews he does and tahts the kind of thing I like. He also spoke about Tameka a.k.a "tiny". He said hes really proud of her not for her proffessional achievments but the fact that shes a good mom. He has two kids with her and considers her oldest daughter his. Larry said something about him having 5 kids and he corrected his saying I have six "I count Mo'nique'nique as my own". That was really sweet.
He says hes a changed man and we'll wait to see. When there was only a minute left larry was joking around about them rapping together then T.I. was like "wheneva you want to just holla at ur boy" or something like that then larry being over 70 didn't understand and was like "pardon". It was funny but then T.I. said, "Mr. Larry, whenver you would like to record and album with me just holla- I mean let me know". IT was really funny to me.
Sorry this is so long people. too much to say
song of the day: California gurls - Katy Perry "CALIRFORNIA GIRLS WE'RE UNFORGETTABLE!" :)
quote of the day: Love creates an "us" withougt destroying a 'me'
Friday, May 14, 2010
Hi Blog!
Today has been the weirdest day. Somes I just let loose. Does that make any sense? I just get in karaoke singing mode and not even caring if my whole family thinks i'm insane. Anyways today when I was a little dissapointed because I was excited to go a lock in but then my friends got sick, one of them choose not to go and the other one is so quiet that even if she did go it would be like sitting alone. So I decided I would have more fun hanging out with my brother then at a lock-in and my dads prayers were answered. He wasen't the biggest fan of this whole mariam sleeping in school thing but my mom had alraedy signed the form. But anyways it was a downer that I coulden't go then when I got home I realized that I left my most valuble possesion on the bus.....my north face jacket. Hello people those things are 200 dollars you can't just leave them behind. I feel like wearing an i'm an idiot banner on my forhead because honestly how could I loose it. All of you need to pray that I find my jacket, and if your athiest then cross your fingers or something cause this is importante (yes I can spell important that was just spanish)!!
Today I also watched the Oprah episode I missed yesturday. You all seriously should watch Oprah. Shes the best host ever. She had the cast of Eclipse on there and it was awesome. I fell in love with Rob Pattison. I know ewww hes totally edward and bella belongs with Jacob but I don't like edward just rob. He has such a bubbly personality. He had me cracking up. Plus hes so real. When oprah asked him what he'd be doing on a saturday night he was dead honest and said he would probably be calling everyone he knows trying to get someone to hang out with him because no one ever invites him to things. Taylor lautner said its the same was for him because everyone thinks your too busy with "celeb" stuff but really your just bored. I figured out the Kristen Stewart is super shy. She barley talked the whole time and when she did she would stutter. I felt really bad for her. Dakota Fanning still just reminds me of the 3 year old from that movie with britney murphey. Eclipse is gonna be AWESOME! June 30th I'm making no plans. I'm just gonna watch Eclipse over and over again. Hopefully I can go to the midnight premire!!
Some intresting things they talked about it Taylor L. said that for the first few months after the movie came out people would constantly be asking him to howl and he'd be like...this is creepy. So eventually he said he didn't want to on the red carpet and no one ever said anything. Its kind of dissapointing, theres something sexy about a howling taylor lautner. How does Mrs. Mariam Lautner sound? Magical huh? haha TEAM JACOB AND THE PACK all the way. I'm in the twilight mojo again.
I'm gonna try to song write again today...
song of the day: The Boy is Mine - Mercades and Santanna from glee
"I also try to read all of my fan mail. A lot of them send me candy, which I'm not allowed to eat 'cause my mom says it might be poisonous."
"Kristens pregnant" -Rob pattison on Oprah trying to start a rumor to embarass kristen
Today has been the weirdest day. Somes I just let loose. Does that make any sense? I just get in karaoke singing mode and not even caring if my whole family thinks i'm insane. Anyways today when I was a little dissapointed because I was excited to go a lock in but then my friends got sick, one of them choose not to go and the other one is so quiet that even if she did go it would be like sitting alone. So I decided I would have more fun hanging out with my brother then at a lock-in and my dads prayers were answered. He wasen't the biggest fan of this whole mariam sleeping in school thing but my mom had alraedy signed the form. But anyways it was a downer that I coulden't go then when I got home I realized that I left my most valuble possesion on the bus.....my north face jacket. Hello people those things are 200 dollars you can't just leave them behind. I feel like wearing an i'm an idiot banner on my forhead because honestly how could I loose it. All of you need to pray that I find my jacket, and if your athiest then cross your fingers or something cause this is importante (yes I can spell important that was just spanish)!!
Today I also watched the Oprah episode I missed yesturday. You all seriously should watch Oprah. Shes the best host ever. She had the cast of Eclipse on there and it was awesome. I fell in love with Rob Pattison. I know ewww hes totally edward and bella belongs with Jacob but I don't like edward just rob. He has such a bubbly personality. He had me cracking up. Plus hes so real. When oprah asked him what he'd be doing on a saturday night he was dead honest and said he would probably be calling everyone he knows trying to get someone to hang out with him because no one ever invites him to things. Taylor lautner said its the same was for him because everyone thinks your too busy with "celeb" stuff but really your just bored. I figured out the Kristen Stewart is super shy. She barley talked the whole time and when she did she would stutter. I felt really bad for her. Dakota Fanning still just reminds me of the 3 year old from that movie with britney murphey. Eclipse is gonna be AWESOME! June 30th I'm making no plans. I'm just gonna watch Eclipse over and over again. Hopefully I can go to the midnight premire!!
Some intresting things they talked about it Taylor L. said that for the first few months after the movie came out people would constantly be asking him to howl and he'd be like...this is creepy. So eventually he said he didn't want to on the red carpet and no one ever said anything. Its kind of dissapointing, theres something sexy about a howling taylor lautner. How does Mrs. Mariam Lautner sound? Magical huh? haha TEAM JACOB AND THE PACK all the way. I'm in the twilight mojo again.
I'm gonna try to song write again today...
song of the day: The Boy is Mine - Mercades and Santanna from glee
"I also try to read all of my fan mail. A lot of them send me candy, which I'm not allowed to eat 'cause my mom says it might be poisonous."
"Kristens pregnant" -Rob pattison on Oprah trying to start a rumor to embarass kristen
Thursday, May 13, 2010
"Lead me/ Love me and free me/ Kiss me and free me/I will feel bleeeseed" - Will you be there? Michael Jackson
Hello blog,
Today has been an intresting day. It started out one of a kind with a super weird dream. I was in the car getting a ride with this family friend of ours on our way to target. The whole ride over we were talking about how hes an illegal alien which is weird because hes totally american. Before I know it we had driven into target. Thank god no one got hurt but I got taken back to my house in hand cuffs and was told that in a few days I would be taken off to juvie. Unfortunetly it was all over the news and all kinds of things. I was embarassed and started crying. It was terrible. I woke up in tears, I cry in my sleep more then I cry when i'm awake. It was seriously sad, but a few minuts later the phone rang. In my head I thought, OMG! Its 5 a.m. whats wrong with the world. Then it rang again and I thought, its someone from africa. When it rang a third time I was tempted to pick it up but truth be told I didn't want to hear bad news which is all that can come out of an early morning call. I got up at the regular time put my clothes on and found my parents upstairs on the phone with somber looks on their faces. My great uncle has passed away.
Now I've met my uncle twice before and he was a good guy. He had a nice smile that would cheer you up. You know people who smile and just light up the world? that was him. Not because he had perfect teeth or whatever just because he was one of the few people left in the world who had genuine happiness. As a little girl I didn't realize he was an alchaholic. He passed away from stomach problems and was only 59 years old. The weird thing is I didn't think I would be sad but I was all day. Part of me was sad because he had passed away but the other part of me was sad because my great uncle had just passed away and I was sitting in a classroom going on my buisness as if he'd never been alive at all. Thats the problem about not living around your family. I thought about my cousisn and the faces that I can't even place a name too. I thought about how they were probably all in morning in africa walking barefoot as the tradition holds. I don't know but I feel so dissconected and for the first time in my life I want to be connected to my family over there. But I don't know how I could do that. You know another thing i'm mad about is the fact that I was able to hold the tears in over a death, but when I had guy issues I coulden't contain the tears. I'm seriously messed up.
On a more light subject theres been some celebrity children drama today. It's funny because I just recently did a blog on them. The first news I got when I got back from school was about Miley Cyrus. TMZ (keep an eye on them their breaking big stories) got access to a video of miley cyrus grinding on a fourty year old man at a party. This was back when she was sixteen. No comment from the cyrus family or disney yet. I don't ever dump on miley because I know shes got talent. I also know what disney stars can become. You have all heard of Christina Aguleria, Justin Timberlake, and Britney spears right? They were all disney stars and have all topped the charts. Disney may be a joke at times but it gets you out.
The other big celelbrity news also involves videos. Private webcam videos of Blanket, Paris and jermaine jacksons son have come out on youtube. Blanket Jackson is so cute and has a bubbling personality. In one of the videos he was dancing, in another he was reciting star wars, but all anyone can talk about is blanket jackson saying "shut up" to his cousin. But anyways it was really cute and you should check it out on youtube. Theres only one video os paris and shes saying "monkey please help me". No one really understands what thats supposed to be.
song of the day: Can't be Tammed - Miley Cyrus
quote of the day: Carry Me
Like You Are My Brother
Love Me Like A Mother
Will You Be There - M.J.
Today has been an intresting day. It started out one of a kind with a super weird dream. I was in the car getting a ride with this family friend of ours on our way to target. The whole ride over we were talking about how hes an illegal alien which is weird because hes totally american. Before I know it we had driven into target. Thank god no one got hurt but I got taken back to my house in hand cuffs and was told that in a few days I would be taken off to juvie. Unfortunetly it was all over the news and all kinds of things. I was embarassed and started crying. It was terrible. I woke up in tears, I cry in my sleep more then I cry when i'm awake. It was seriously sad, but a few minuts later the phone rang. In my head I thought, OMG! Its 5 a.m. whats wrong with the world. Then it rang again and I thought, its someone from africa. When it rang a third time I was tempted to pick it up but truth be told I didn't want to hear bad news which is all that can come out of an early morning call. I got up at the regular time put my clothes on and found my parents upstairs on the phone with somber looks on their faces. My great uncle has passed away.
Now I've met my uncle twice before and he was a good guy. He had a nice smile that would cheer you up. You know people who smile and just light up the world? that was him. Not because he had perfect teeth or whatever just because he was one of the few people left in the world who had genuine happiness. As a little girl I didn't realize he was an alchaholic. He passed away from stomach problems and was only 59 years old. The weird thing is I didn't think I would be sad but I was all day. Part of me was sad because he had passed away but the other part of me was sad because my great uncle had just passed away and I was sitting in a classroom going on my buisness as if he'd never been alive at all. Thats the problem about not living around your family. I thought about my cousisn and the faces that I can't even place a name too. I thought about how they were probably all in morning in africa walking barefoot as the tradition holds. I don't know but I feel so dissconected and for the first time in my life I want to be connected to my family over there. But I don't know how I could do that. You know another thing i'm mad about is the fact that I was able to hold the tears in over a death, but when I had guy issues I coulden't contain the tears. I'm seriously messed up.
On a more light subject theres been some celebrity children drama today. It's funny because I just recently did a blog on them. The first news I got when I got back from school was about Miley Cyrus. TMZ (keep an eye on them their breaking big stories) got access to a video of miley cyrus grinding on a fourty year old man at a party. This was back when she was sixteen. No comment from the cyrus family or disney yet. I don't ever dump on miley because I know shes got talent. I also know what disney stars can become. You have all heard of Christina Aguleria, Justin Timberlake, and Britney spears right? They were all disney stars and have all topped the charts. Disney may be a joke at times but it gets you out.
The other big celelbrity news also involves videos. Private webcam videos of Blanket, Paris and jermaine jacksons son have come out on youtube. Blanket Jackson is so cute and has a bubbling personality. In one of the videos he was dancing, in another he was reciting star wars, but all anyone can talk about is blanket jackson saying "shut up" to his cousin. But anyways it was really cute and you should check it out on youtube. Theres only one video os paris and shes saying "monkey please help me". No one really understands what thats supposed to be.
song of the day: Can't be Tammed - Miley Cyrus
quote of the day: Carry Me
Like You Are My Brother
Love Me Like A Mother
Will You Be There - M.J.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
"You Know you love me/You know you care/Just shout whenver & ill be there/You want my love/you want my heart/&we'll never ever be apart" - Baby J.B.
Hi Readers
Hows life? Mine is actually pretty good. I'm in a good mood. You know why? One because i'm on the mission. Whats the mission? To make the last week of july/begining of augast be the best of my life by going to both the justin bieber concert and lady gaga concert. Ok, so what i'm about to tell you is super embarassing. None of you can tell anyone or else I would die. I only trust you with this precious information because you have to be pretty darn cool to be reading the blog and with coolnss comes compassion and with compassion comes understanding. Your probably saying get to the point already. The point is I caught bieber fever. I know its pathetic. But understand I was never one of those disney child star loving people. I never liked the jonas brothers of other disney freaks but this justin guy hes diffrent. He totally has swagger, hes only a year older then me, killer smile, and an awesome voice. How could I not fall head over heels. Not to meantion hes touring with the one and only sean kingston so fate is saying MARIAM MUST GO! And ignoring fate is criminal so cross your fingers for me to go and zip your lips about the emabarassing fever.
I have a random fact of information. I am one of those girls who has been planing her wedding from birth. It's gonna be the best day of my life and I already know it. I can invision the whole thing in my mind and its pretty amazing. But anyways part of this fantasy has been to wear a Vera Wang wedding dress. Guess who Vera Wang hung out with this week? Kim Kardashian.Theres a picture of the two together on the people's magazine website. And guess what? Vera Wang is...not what I accepted. For starters shes asain. Never knew that. And the second thing is shes kind of old. Like she was wearing no makeup and a not Vera Wang-y outfit. I was like wow, thats so unaccepted. Vera Wang is...normal. Wow! It dosen't change the fact that I want to wear a Vera Wang it just caught me by suprise.
Well readers this ones short today because I must got watch American Idol. Oooh and I got my hair done today. It looks pretty good :)
song of the day: Find your love - Drake (I cannot stop listening to this freaking song its so good). Anyone who knows about good music know that this is the stuff. For the record I know it was the song of the day yesturday too but.......its sooo good
quote of the day: Be the change you wish to see in the world - ghandi
Hows life? Mine is actually pretty good. I'm in a good mood. You know why? One because i'm on the mission. Whats the mission? To make the last week of july/begining of augast be the best of my life by going to both the justin bieber concert and lady gaga concert. Ok, so what i'm about to tell you is super embarassing. None of you can tell anyone or else I would die. I only trust you with this precious information because you have to be pretty darn cool to be reading the blog and with coolnss comes compassion and with compassion comes understanding. Your probably saying get to the point already. The point is I caught bieber fever. I know its pathetic. But understand I was never one of those disney child star loving people. I never liked the jonas brothers of other disney freaks but this justin guy hes diffrent. He totally has swagger, hes only a year older then me, killer smile, and an awesome voice. How could I not fall head over heels. Not to meantion hes touring with the one and only sean kingston so fate is saying MARIAM MUST GO! And ignoring fate is criminal so cross your fingers for me to go and zip your lips about the emabarassing fever.
I have a random fact of information. I am one of those girls who has been planing her wedding from birth. It's gonna be the best day of my life and I already know it. I can invision the whole thing in my mind and its pretty amazing. But anyways part of this fantasy has been to wear a Vera Wang wedding dress. Guess who Vera Wang hung out with this week? Kim Kardashian.Theres a picture of the two together on the people's magazine website. And guess what? Vera Wang is...not what I accepted. For starters shes asain. Never knew that. And the second thing is shes kind of old. Like she was wearing no makeup and a not Vera Wang-y outfit. I was like wow, thats so unaccepted. Vera Wang is...normal. Wow! It dosen't change the fact that I want to wear a Vera Wang it just caught me by suprise.
Well readers this ones short today because I must got watch American Idol. Oooh and I got my hair done today. It looks pretty good :)
song of the day: Find your love - Drake (I cannot stop listening to this freaking song its so good). Anyone who knows about good music know that this is the stuff. For the record I know it was the song of the day yesturday too but.......its sooo good
quote of the day: Be the change you wish to see in the world - ghandi
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
"I better find your love and I better find your heart/ I bet if I give all my love then nothings gonna tear us apart/ I'm more then just a number"
Hey Readers,
So for the record the song of the day is called Find you love and its by Drake. I love drake. Have I ever meantioned. Its relieving that a guy can get up there and do the whole rap thing without fifty million tattoos, a jail cell, and grillz. I know it sound awfully anti-rapper but I find it kind of hard to take those "tough" kind of rappers seriously. But Drake is diffrent. Hes cute and he'll smile and the song find your love is awesome. I like the lyrics because their easy to relate too. Its a good song you all should check it out. But while I was listening to find your love on a walk I started thinking about lyrics. I've noticed that every artist has their own lyric style. I guess you can say that my songs revolve around the chorus which I thought was most normal but with some songs the chorus is just totally random. I think this summer i'm gonna try and write some diffrent kind of songs. I hope its a good idea. I'll tell you how it goes, and maybe even post some lyrics :)
In Epic Traditions, which is my current english class we're reading a book called the Inferno. What is the book about? Sin, and Hell. You know this is what I don't like about public school. I'm stuck reading a book about all the things that will get you to hell when i'd rather read a book on the way to heaven. Part of me really wishes my school had a religion reading class. I'm not trying to be predjidice or whatever but the atheist people woulden't have to sign up for it. Anyways sorry if I pushed anyones buttons but back to the book. It makes me a little sad reading the book because I find myself doing a lot of thinking about whether I commit some of those sins. I definatly am not as extreme as the people Dante finds in the inferno but I feel like maybe its not ok for me to even be doing the little things that are bad. Like making fun of people in my head, because newsflash people. God can hear your thoughts and mine are not always good. So be careful what you think, slick
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG! Now you know that means right??? Last night Gossip Girl and One Tree Hill blew me away. I'll start with one tree hill. It was amazing because one of the main characters Haley is really depressed and the episode ended with her jumping into the cool attempting suicide. It was like OMG! So ofcourse it was a typical one tree hill end of the season where one of the characters is in danger only this time I don't know if being a main character is enough. This may be the last season on one tree hill but people on twitter were pettitioning and #WeareONETH became a trending topic which is awesome.
Right when I thought one tree hill coulden't be any better Gossip girl took T.V. to the next level. The episode was killer and Chuck finally got his in with blair. They did what they did best and schemed to save their friend. It had been awhile since the full blair waldorf scheme was pulled but with Chuck at her side they realized that Serenas father was phony. And when nate called the police to arrest his butt, Dan was by Serenas side in saving him and you know what that means. Dan and Serena together AGAIN! YES! Then Little J showed up at Nates house when he was all alone with no one to comfort him. I'm feeling that couple too. Then Chuck walked to up to blair and said something amazing. It was another legendary Chuck Bass line. He said, " I'll wait for you at the top of the empire state building. If your not in my presence by 7:01 then I close my heart to you forever". Blair replied to" You can't Affair to remember me". But what everyone watching gossip girl knew was Blair and Chuck are two puzzle pieces that fit. They belong together. IT didn't help that Blair looked over at the empire state building ending the show. What was AMAZING was the preview for next weeks episode. It involved CHUCK BASS PROPOSING TO BLAIR. OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG. I screamed...I seriously coulden't help it. A GOSSIP GIRL POSSIBLE WEDDING. I'll fill you in next week on what happened.
song of the day: Find your love - Drake
quotes from gossip girl episode: Nate: Last year, Georgina pretended to be this rich Canadian to get Poppy, but things got all messed up when she turned her back on Jesus. - Nate
"You know what they say, Love they neighbor as thyself (you should have seen it in the episode i'm still laughing about that line) - Gossip Girl
"We don't expect you to keep up, its beyond basic rugby stratagy" Chuck bass
"I dont see why we need blair. You read gossip girl. Extortions what I do all day" - Jenny "little J" humphrey
And my favorite:
Blair: I mean, who starts a courtship during the day, anyway?
Serena: Humans who venture out in light and aren't named Bass? = <3
So for the record the song of the day is called Find you love and its by Drake. I love drake. Have I ever meantioned. Its relieving that a guy can get up there and do the whole rap thing without fifty million tattoos, a jail cell, and grillz. I know it sound awfully anti-rapper but I find it kind of hard to take those "tough" kind of rappers seriously. But Drake is diffrent. Hes cute and he'll smile and the song find your love is awesome. I like the lyrics because their easy to relate too. Its a good song you all should check it out. But while I was listening to find your love on a walk I started thinking about lyrics. I've noticed that every artist has their own lyric style. I guess you can say that my songs revolve around the chorus which I thought was most normal but with some songs the chorus is just totally random. I think this summer i'm gonna try and write some diffrent kind of songs. I hope its a good idea. I'll tell you how it goes, and maybe even post some lyrics :)
In Epic Traditions, which is my current english class we're reading a book called the Inferno. What is the book about? Sin, and Hell. You know this is what I don't like about public school. I'm stuck reading a book about all the things that will get you to hell when i'd rather read a book on the way to heaven. Part of me really wishes my school had a religion reading class. I'm not trying to be predjidice or whatever but the atheist people woulden't have to sign up for it. Anyways sorry if I pushed anyones buttons but back to the book. It makes me a little sad reading the book because I find myself doing a lot of thinking about whether I commit some of those sins. I definatly am not as extreme as the people Dante finds in the inferno but I feel like maybe its not ok for me to even be doing the little things that are bad. Like making fun of people in my head, because newsflash people. God can hear your thoughts and mine are not always good. So be careful what you think, slick
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG! Now you know that means right??? Last night Gossip Girl and One Tree Hill blew me away. I'll start with one tree hill. It was amazing because one of the main characters Haley is really depressed and the episode ended with her jumping into the cool attempting suicide. It was like OMG! So ofcourse it was a typical one tree hill end of the season where one of the characters is in danger only this time I don't know if being a main character is enough. This may be the last season on one tree hill but people on twitter were pettitioning and #WeareONETH became a trending topic which is awesome.
Right when I thought one tree hill coulden't be any better Gossip girl took T.V. to the next level. The episode was killer and Chuck finally got his in with blair. They did what they did best and schemed to save their friend. It had been awhile since the full blair waldorf scheme was pulled but with Chuck at her side they realized that Serenas father was phony. And when nate called the police to arrest his butt, Dan was by Serenas side in saving him and you know what that means. Dan and Serena together AGAIN! YES! Then Little J showed up at Nates house when he was all alone with no one to comfort him. I'm feeling that couple too. Then Chuck walked to up to blair and said something amazing. It was another legendary Chuck Bass line. He said, " I'll wait for you at the top of the empire state building. If your not in my presence by 7:01 then I close my heart to you forever". Blair replied to" You can't Affair to remember me". But what everyone watching gossip girl knew was Blair and Chuck are two puzzle pieces that fit. They belong together. IT didn't help that Blair looked over at the empire state building ending the show. What was AMAZING was the preview for next weeks episode. It involved CHUCK BASS PROPOSING TO BLAIR. OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG. I screamed...I seriously coulden't help it. A GOSSIP GIRL POSSIBLE WEDDING. I'll fill you in next week on what happened.
song of the day: Find your love - Drake
quotes from gossip girl episode: Nate: Last year, Georgina pretended to be this rich Canadian to get Poppy, but things got all messed up when she turned her back on Jesus. - Nate
"You know what they say, Love they neighbor as thyself (you should have seen it in the episode i'm still laughing about that line) - Gossip Girl
"We don't expect you to keep up, its beyond basic rugby stratagy" Chuck bass
"I dont see why we need blair. You read gossip girl. Extortions what I do all day" - Jenny "little J" humphrey
And my favorite:
Blair: I mean, who starts a courtship during the day, anyway?
Serena: Humans who venture out in light and aren't named Bass? = <3
Monday, May 10, 2010
!Ai Caramba!
So something crazy happened to me and I feel like I should share it with you world. It just proves that me survivng a year of school without pulling my hair out or quitting is a miricle. So today I walk into spansih class in a pretty good mood and I find that the desks were all put to the side. I sat on the ground along with the other people then the teacher told us all to stand by our partners. So I stood next to my partner who just so happen to be a guy. He then put his arm around me and I wanted to be like "Get off me freak" but I was nice and just stood there doing my best to half smile. He finally let go of me (thank you jesus) and the teacher told us we were learning the mexican hat dance. Let me explain something, when I signed up for spanish it wasen't because I Suddenly wanted to be mexican. It was because without 2 coninuing years of a language its harder to get full scholorships.
Anyways we she taught us the steps andI tried to look like someone wasen't shooting me but it was hard. I LOVE to dance but not in the middle of spansih class at 9:00 am. I like dacning in the dark where no one can see your ever move. I just feel it more then you know? And I also feel it more when dancing with the person of my choice and not some random guy that thinks its ok to just be all touchy touchy and cheat on my in spansih. So we did the moves then there was this part where the girls had to get on one knee and then the guys were supposed to kick over our heads. So we went threw the whole dance and then mr. annoymous galloped around like a crazy instead of doing the step so we can get this whole ordeal over with. It got to the part where I kneel down and he freakin kicked me in the head. It was TERRIBLE! The class thought it was funny but I wanted to yank his teeth one by one I was so mad. Maybe I can find the humor in the stupid hat dance someday but for today it sucked!
No i'm not angry at all.....
Anyways we she taught us the steps andI tried to look like someone wasen't shooting me but it was hard. I LOVE to dance but not in the middle of spansih class at 9:00 am. I like dacning in the dark where no one can see your ever move. I just feel it more then you know? And I also feel it more when dancing with the person of my choice and not some random guy that thinks its ok to just be all touchy touchy and cheat on my in spansih. So we did the moves then there was this part where the girls had to get on one knee and then the guys were supposed to kick over our heads. So we went threw the whole dance and then mr. annoymous galloped around like a crazy instead of doing the step so we can get this whole ordeal over with. It got to the part where I kneel down and he freakin kicked me in the head. It was TERRIBLE! The class thought it was funny but I wanted to yank his teeth one by one I was so mad. Maybe I can find the humor in the stupid hat dance someday but for today it sucked!
No i'm not angry at all.....
"Tears of pain/Tears of Joy one thing can destroy/ Is our pride deep inside we are one" - We are one, Lion King 2 (AWEOSME MOVIE!)
Dear blog,
Guess what? Once again I realized that this was public. Subconciously I always knew that like anyone could read this but every once in awhile it really clicks that like my dad could be reading this or something. How weird would that be? No offense dad if you are reading this. Anyways I thought of some things to blog about today but most of them got thrown away after watching tyra. I have a not so good fact for you ladies. It was proven by tyras scientist taht 30-50% of men in a serious relationship cheat. Isen't that just disgusting. Most of them are really doing it on a physical level and stuff and I think i've told you my views on that whole thing before. Anyways i'll tell you what Tyras scientist said, he basically said that it is in guys physical makeup that they were made to spread their linage a.k.a. scientifically guys were made to spread their sperm. So supposedly scientifically their all cheating because of the scientific urge to spread their goods.
Do you believe it? I kind of do but I still don't think thats an excuse. I think a big part of this problem in america is us ladies. Why? Well a ton of girls in america walk around half naked willing to do anything and not caring at all who your with. If there was no one to cheat with then guys woulden't be doing it. So next time your complaining about your boyfriend cheating take care of yourself and make it so you don't hurt some other girl and make her feel as bad as your feeling. Tyra banks said that this one time she got cheated on and she already had an exsit plan but before she left she asked her boyfriend something in the car. She said," (fill in the blank) why do guys cheat? And he told her for change. Then this one girl in the audience went crazy and was like "to guys girls are like food. They can't be having toast every day they want some friends and macaroni too". It cracked me up as food analogies always do.
Ok so this weekend I watched a couple movies and one of them was....Maid of honor. It came out like 2 years ago and I know that there are some of you who are all, "I dont watch olllld stuff". Two years ago isen't old to me and I adore wedding movies so this one was made for me. Anyways in the movie he has all these crazy rules like he can never see a girl twice in one week and just all this nutty stuff. And it made me think that everyone has their rules for themselves. Some people are really crazy about things though. Like one thing me and a lot of people can agree on is foods touching. I totally don't like my foods touching unless its like a food and its sauce. But like my meat, vegtable, and sides touching is just weird to me. I know its insance. I wonder what makes us create these rules. I didn't get it from anyone in my family I just do it. Which brings up what the blast from the past will be next week. I'll save it though. Get excited! :)
Song of the day: OMG - Usher
I seriously can not get enough of this song. Its one of my favorites. I feel like Ushers back and back for real. His last album while married was not fully what it should ahve been but this new album is good stuff. Yes, I still fantasize about marrying usher. Don't judge, oprah does too. He and will.i.am were on the shoe today and the camara zoomed in on Oprah and she was like awe struck then usher threw her his glasses and winked. It was cute. Catch it on tonight at 9 (even though you all should be watching GOSSIP GIRL AND ONE TREE HILL! )
quote of the day: Life is like a box of choclates you never know what your gonna get - Forrest Gump
Now please tell me you've all seen forrest gump readers. Its one of the funniest, realist, most amazing movies out there. Its my daddys favorite movie actually and it takes something really good for him to "Waste his precious time" and watch multiple times. You all should check it out.
Guess what? Once again I realized that this was public. Subconciously I always knew that like anyone could read this but every once in awhile it really clicks that like my dad could be reading this or something. How weird would that be? No offense dad if you are reading this. Anyways I thought of some things to blog about today but most of them got thrown away after watching tyra. I have a not so good fact for you ladies. It was proven by tyras scientist taht 30-50% of men in a serious relationship cheat. Isen't that just disgusting. Most of them are really doing it on a physical level and stuff and I think i've told you my views on that whole thing before. Anyways i'll tell you what Tyras scientist said, he basically said that it is in guys physical makeup that they were made to spread their linage a.k.a. scientifically guys were made to spread their sperm. So supposedly scientifically their all cheating because of the scientific urge to spread their goods.
Do you believe it? I kind of do but I still don't think thats an excuse. I think a big part of this problem in america is us ladies. Why? Well a ton of girls in america walk around half naked willing to do anything and not caring at all who your with. If there was no one to cheat with then guys woulden't be doing it. So next time your complaining about your boyfriend cheating take care of yourself and make it so you don't hurt some other girl and make her feel as bad as your feeling. Tyra banks said that this one time she got cheated on and she already had an exsit plan but before she left she asked her boyfriend something in the car. She said," (fill in the blank) why do guys cheat? And he told her for change. Then this one girl in the audience went crazy and was like "to guys girls are like food. They can't be having toast every day they want some friends and macaroni too". It cracked me up as food analogies always do.
Ok so this weekend I watched a couple movies and one of them was....Maid of honor. It came out like 2 years ago and I know that there are some of you who are all, "I dont watch olllld stuff". Two years ago isen't old to me and I adore wedding movies so this one was made for me. Anyways in the movie he has all these crazy rules like he can never see a girl twice in one week and just all this nutty stuff. And it made me think that everyone has their rules for themselves. Some people are really crazy about things though. Like one thing me and a lot of people can agree on is foods touching. I totally don't like my foods touching unless its like a food and its sauce. But like my meat, vegtable, and sides touching is just weird to me. I know its insance. I wonder what makes us create these rules. I didn't get it from anyone in my family I just do it. Which brings up what the blast from the past will be next week. I'll save it though. Get excited! :)
Song of the day: OMG - Usher
I seriously can not get enough of this song. Its one of my favorites. I feel like Ushers back and back for real. His last album while married was not fully what it should ahve been but this new album is good stuff. Yes, I still fantasize about marrying usher. Don't judge, oprah does too. He and will.i.am were on the shoe today and the camara zoomed in on Oprah and she was like awe struck then usher threw her his glasses and winked. It was cute. Catch it on tonight at 9 (even though you all should be watching GOSSIP GIRL AND ONE TREE HILL! )
quote of the day: Life is like a box of choclates you never know what your gonna get - Forrest Gump
Now please tell me you've all seen forrest gump readers. Its one of the funniest, realist, most amazing movies out there. Its my daddys favorite movie actually and it takes something really good for him to "Waste his precious time" and watch multiple times. You all should check it out.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
"You give me something that makes me scared alright/ This could be nothing but i'm willing to give it a try"
Dear Blog!
Hows life going? So I kind of want to touch on the last blog a little bit. I typed made it from my ipod so please excuse the mistakes. Anyways I thought it was worth blogging about because it made me feel good. And it reminded me that the best people see your shinning light when your not even trying. I'm done trying to dress to impress. No this does not mean i'm giving up on shopping at cute stores and looking good I just want to dress up for me now. Speaking of shopping I think I get to go to the mall tommorow and hopefully get some new clothes. I love clothes. I don't understnad people who are content with the same clothes for their whole lives. Clothes are amazing. I am also starting to discover that shoes are too, hence some of the new cute shoes I have.
Tommorow is mothers day. Did you all buy anything for your mommy's. I think you definatly should because your mothers not only gave birth to you but they love you very much and it shoulden't hurtt them something nice once a year. Appriciate your mother, I saw saddest thing on oprah. So I turned on the oprah show and there were 3 teenage boys in suits on the couch. I was like wow, their attractive and I am definatly watching oprah today. After a few minutes I caught on to what their story was. Something happened to their birth paretns so this woman offered to adopt all 3 boys which is really against the odd. Most people only adopt babies and its rare for people over a certain age to get adopted. ITs even rarer if the boys are black. So them getting adopted was a big deal. When they arrived in the home the mother started abusing them. She starved them. Why? Nobody knows. But she would feed them like cubes of cheese while she was pigging out and she would put a lock on the fridge when she left. It was crazy. These poor boys almost died before being found by social services. It was a good story.
Readers you should watch talk shows more often. You really learn a lot for them and the best are ending next year. Who are the best? Oprah and Tyra. Oprah is more good at the sob stories and shes a better interviewer of celebritys. Shes also just oprah which gives her a million cool points. Tyra is more crazy and she gets the most intresting people on there. Like Cougars, prostitutes, people with crazy medical problems that are sad but intresting, young celebrities, and my favorite....hair and fashion experts. I learn so much about Clothing and manicures and just all kinds of beauty stuff from Tyra. So start watching talk shows. Well, not ellen because shes nto really an educational expirence. I don't like her show so much aside from the fact she gives away more free stuff. Its just not my thing. So the advirtisment of the day goes too... TALK SHOWS!
song of the day: You give me something - James Morrison
Quote of the day: I'll be your bridge over troubled water
Hows life going? So I kind of want to touch on the last blog a little bit. I typed made it from my ipod so please excuse the mistakes. Anyways I thought it was worth blogging about because it made me feel good. And it reminded me that the best people see your shinning light when your not even trying. I'm done trying to dress to impress. No this does not mean i'm giving up on shopping at cute stores and looking good I just want to dress up for me now. Speaking of shopping I think I get to go to the mall tommorow and hopefully get some new clothes. I love clothes. I don't understnad people who are content with the same clothes for their whole lives. Clothes are amazing. I am also starting to discover that shoes are too, hence some of the new cute shoes I have.
Tommorow is mothers day. Did you all buy anything for your mommy's. I think you definatly should because your mothers not only gave birth to you but they love you very much and it shoulden't hurtt them something nice once a year. Appriciate your mother, I saw saddest thing on oprah. So I turned on the oprah show and there were 3 teenage boys in suits on the couch. I was like wow, their attractive and I am definatly watching oprah today. After a few minutes I caught on to what their story was. Something happened to their birth paretns so this woman offered to adopt all 3 boys which is really against the odd. Most people only adopt babies and its rare for people over a certain age to get adopted. ITs even rarer if the boys are black. So them getting adopted was a big deal. When they arrived in the home the mother started abusing them. She starved them. Why? Nobody knows. But she would feed them like cubes of cheese while she was pigging out and she would put a lock on the fridge when she left. It was crazy. These poor boys almost died before being found by social services. It was a good story.
Readers you should watch talk shows more often. You really learn a lot for them and the best are ending next year. Who are the best? Oprah and Tyra. Oprah is more good at the sob stories and shes a better interviewer of celebritys. Shes also just oprah which gives her a million cool points. Tyra is more crazy and she gets the most intresting people on there. Like Cougars, prostitutes, people with crazy medical problems that are sad but intresting, young celebrities, and my favorite....hair and fashion experts. I learn so much about Clothing and manicures and just all kinds of beauty stuff from Tyra. So start watching talk shows. Well, not ellen because shes nto really an educational expirence. I don't like her show so much aside from the fact she gives away more free stuff. Its just not my thing. So the advirtisment of the day goes too... TALK SHOWS!
song of the day: You give me something - James Morrison
Quote of the day: I'll be your bridge over troubled water
Friday, May 7, 2010
"I won't say i'm in love" - Hercules
Dear blog,
I have a really happy story to tell you about. Remember that boyfriend hunt ? I didn't have to look very far. A certain neighbor boy walked me home today and it was fantastic. Me and him are kind of cursed though because whenever we get close to getting close my family shows up. I don't want them to question me so I have to flee like Cinderella. Today i forgot my house key at home so I had to call my aunt. Me and Jacob talked about a variety of things. Him graduating and coming up to freestate. Choir and my brother. Then he called us "us". It seemed like he was gearing the conversation then both akira and my aunt showed up. If I back track we somehow started talking about my brother and his neighbor being best friends then he meantioned how one day my brothers friend and his family saw "us" walking home and then they were like J.! What are you and Bens sister doing together? He said they thought we we were dating. And I was like really? Then I noticed my aunt and told him I forgot my key and my aunt was waiting for me. So we said by and went our seperate way but he reminded me what a good guy he is. It's nice to have a guy friend. :) ahh!
The cool thing is that he just likes me for me. I always meet up with him spontaniously so I'm never dressed up or trying to look hot. He still talks to me Nd makes me feel good. I only have one more thing to say. Thank God for boys
Song of the day: I won't say i'm in love
quote of the day: I can't help fallin' in
love with youu - Elvis
I have a really happy story to tell you about. Remember that boyfriend hunt ? I didn't have to look very far. A certain neighbor boy walked me home today and it was fantastic. Me and him are kind of cursed though because whenever we get close to getting close my family shows up. I don't want them to question me so I have to flee like Cinderella. Today i forgot my house key at home so I had to call my aunt. Me and Jacob talked about a variety of things. Him graduating and coming up to freestate. Choir and my brother. Then he called us "us". It seemed like he was gearing the conversation then both akira and my aunt showed up. If I back track we somehow started talking about my brother and his neighbor being best friends then he meantioned how one day my brothers friend and his family saw "us" walking home and then they were like J.! What are you and Bens sister doing together? He said they thought we we were dating. And I was like really? Then I noticed my aunt and told him I forgot my key and my aunt was waiting for me. So we said by and went our seperate way but he reminded me what a good guy he is. It's nice to have a guy friend. :) ahh!
The cool thing is that he just likes me for me. I always meet up with him spontaniously so I'm never dressed up or trying to look hot. He still talks to me Nd makes me feel good. I only have one more thing to say. Thank God for boys
Song of the day: I won't say i'm in love
quote of the day: I can't help fallin' in
love with youu - Elvis
Thursday, May 6, 2010
"Smile though your heart is aching/ Smile even though its breaking/ When there are clouds in the sky you'll get by.." Smile by Charlie, MJ, and Glee
Hey readers,
I've been feeling yucky ever since I got back from school. The day started out ok. We talked a lot about immigration in spanish again. Thats like our new favorite topic in there and we waste like 30 minutes a class dissucussing diffrent ideas. Let me just say that some people at my school are sick. Talking about shooting down, and poisening. Their inhumaness just gives me shivers. Anyways after spanish I had seminar which was filled with fun because now i'm part of this glee fan club with some cool people and we'll meet every thursday to discuss glee. FINALLY people who enjoy television almost as much as I do. Then after that I did some more school things. When the bell rang to release I stayed to help Diversity club sell some cookies. We did pretty good and I bought a dollars worth. I know its sad but I dont have much money. I'm poor, and not ashamed to take donations :)
Anyways it went pretty well but I was a little dissapointed in my friends. Sometimes they just act so stupid. I'm not trying to me mean but its true. They act like 4 year olds sometimes and it's embarassing. And as cute as four year olds are its not cute when your in high school. I don't think I can take that anymore. I do have a few friends who are on the same maturity level but I'm starting to feel diffrent from them. One on one or even three on three we all can enjoy ourselves then act our age. But the minute one of our friends shows up everyone lets their gaurd down and acts like kids doing stupid games and making noises. If you know me at all you know that is NOT what I consider fun. I don't mind getting silly and being a little imature sometimes but they take it to a whole nother level and it bugs me. So how do I solve this problem? I count down days till summer. For the record it is 18 more days including weekends now. YAY!! I think a break from my social circle is muched needed.
I guess sometimes I just need someone to talk too. That is a big part of my problem. I need someone to sit down and just talk talk talk talk talk talk talk too. Although I do have some great friends and a wonderful family none of them really have time for me to just let it all out. My mom is easily annoyed and has a million and one things to think about. My dad is on a ship somewhere far away. My brothers world revolves around the wii. You can see how this can all be a dielema to me just letting go. I feel pretty lonley sometimes. I mean not that i'm a loner theres a million people around me most of the time but even when i'm in a room full of people I still feel alone. Maybe I should start boyfriend hunting... Theres really nothing around. JD has now sucken too low for me to even like him anymore. He posted this terrible rumor on facebook about this poor girl and I guess i'm starting to see his man whoreness. Then Plan is graduating in like a week so thats not gonna happen. Prince is a few miles away and I honestly don't think he wants to be chased after. He has a lot of life ahead of him and I for sure don't want to be a road block. So wahts the answer to my problem. Lots of bubble baths and oprah. And most of all music to keep me entertained. When the radio is playing i'm not alone.
song of the day: Smile - originally by Charlie Chaplin and performed by many others along the way.
quote of the day: We're born alone, We live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for a moment that we're not alone
I've been feeling yucky ever since I got back from school. The day started out ok. We talked a lot about immigration in spanish again. Thats like our new favorite topic in there and we waste like 30 minutes a class dissucussing diffrent ideas. Let me just say that some people at my school are sick. Talking about shooting down, and poisening. Their inhumaness just gives me shivers. Anyways after spanish I had seminar which was filled with fun because now i'm part of this glee fan club with some cool people and we'll meet every thursday to discuss glee. FINALLY people who enjoy television almost as much as I do. Then after that I did some more school things. When the bell rang to release I stayed to help Diversity club sell some cookies. We did pretty good and I bought a dollars worth. I know its sad but I dont have much money. I'm poor, and not ashamed to take donations :)
Anyways it went pretty well but I was a little dissapointed in my friends. Sometimes they just act so stupid. I'm not trying to me mean but its true. They act like 4 year olds sometimes and it's embarassing. And as cute as four year olds are its not cute when your in high school. I don't think I can take that anymore. I do have a few friends who are on the same maturity level but I'm starting to feel diffrent from them. One on one or even three on three we all can enjoy ourselves then act our age. But the minute one of our friends shows up everyone lets their gaurd down and acts like kids doing stupid games and making noises. If you know me at all you know that is NOT what I consider fun. I don't mind getting silly and being a little imature sometimes but they take it to a whole nother level and it bugs me. So how do I solve this problem? I count down days till summer. For the record it is 18 more days including weekends now. YAY!! I think a break from my social circle is muched needed.
I guess sometimes I just need someone to talk too. That is a big part of my problem. I need someone to sit down and just talk talk talk talk talk talk talk too. Although I do have some great friends and a wonderful family none of them really have time for me to just let it all out. My mom is easily annoyed and has a million and one things to think about. My dad is on a ship somewhere far away. My brothers world revolves around the wii. You can see how this can all be a dielema to me just letting go. I feel pretty lonley sometimes. I mean not that i'm a loner theres a million people around me most of the time but even when i'm in a room full of people I still feel alone. Maybe I should start boyfriend hunting... Theres really nothing around. JD has now sucken too low for me to even like him anymore. He posted this terrible rumor on facebook about this poor girl and I guess i'm starting to see his man whoreness. Then Plan is graduating in like a week so thats not gonna happen. Prince is a few miles away and I honestly don't think he wants to be chased after. He has a lot of life ahead of him and I for sure don't want to be a road block. So wahts the answer to my problem. Lots of bubble baths and oprah. And most of all music to keep me entertained. When the radio is playing i'm not alone.
song of the day: Smile - originally by Charlie Chaplin and performed by many others along the way.
quote of the day: We're born alone, We live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for a moment that we're not alone
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
"Part time lover and a full time friend/ The monkey on your back is the latest trend/ I dont see what anyone can see in anyone else/ but you..."
Hey readers! So guess what? Last night I had the weirdest dream and it involved this guy and we were dating. Then my dad turned out to be the subsitute for my chemistry teacher who was hiding because she posted on facebook about me being involved with the guy. It was the craziest dream. But it got me thinking , you have to really know someone to dream about them right. Because I can totally tell who everyone in my dreams are so I must have thier features adn stuff memorized right? Do you ever think about your dreams. Another weird thing about me is I'll wake up to use the rest room or something then pick up right where I left off on the dream. Most people can't do that. Anyways it just started me on thinking about dreams and I thought I would save that.
Last night I stayed up later then usual because of television. It was a good night for tv because amerian idol killed it. AND Glee is back!! This episode was pretty good. I liked the plot and I liked the fact that Emma finally stood up for herself and got mad!!! You all need to watch this episode if you missed out. Ok but the reason I was up late was because after Glee I watched Laura Bush and her twin daughters on Oprah with my mom. Let me tell you I started feeling really bad. I had so many mean ideas about President Bush and trashed him so much when he seems to be a good guy with a good family. It was so nice to kind of see the kind of people they are. They are sooo nice. They love each other and their children are both in carreers where they help each other. I never really thought about the romance between Mr. ex president and his wife but they are very much in love. Oprah intrested me so much that I put her book on hold in the library and am looking forward to reading it :)
I'm sorry this ones a little short but I have a choir concert to get ready for. Have a good day readers!
song of the day: You can't touch this - Glee
Quote of the day:
Last night I stayed up later then usual because of television. It was a good night for tv because amerian idol killed it. AND Glee is back!! This episode was pretty good. I liked the plot and I liked the fact that Emma finally stood up for herself and got mad!!! You all need to watch this episode if you missed out. Ok but the reason I was up late was because after Glee I watched Laura Bush and her twin daughters on Oprah with my mom. Let me tell you I started feeling really bad. I had so many mean ideas about President Bush and trashed him so much when he seems to be a good guy with a good family. It was so nice to kind of see the kind of people they are. They are sooo nice. They love each other and their children are both in carreers where they help each other. I never really thought about the romance between Mr. ex president and his wife but they are very much in love. Oprah intrested me so much that I put her book on hold in the library and am looking forward to reading it :)
I'm sorry this ones a little short but I have a choir concert to get ready for. Have a good day readers!
song of the day: You can't touch this - Glee
Quote of the day:
"Baby let me love you down, theres so many ways to love you/ got me like oh my gosh i'm so in loove" - OMG Usher (love the song)
Dear blog,readers, and creepers
Hows it going? I missed you all...well not any creepers but the rest of you I missed. I seriously did i've been dying to blog all week but so much to say and so little time caused me to just keep taking notes about what to write about. This blog is so good for me you don't even know. Theres so much I want to talk about and so little time i'm just going to start the topics now. Well I wanted to chat a little bit about young hollywood. You know who I think is an adorable guy in old hollywood that a lot of people don't know. Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruises adopted son. Hes so cute. Kendall and Kylie Jenner may not have the kardashian blood but I feel a big future ahead for them. Miley Cyrus is pretty sensational in my book because she has such a big voice and she can act. The possibilties for her in the future is endless.
Prince, Paris, and Blanket Jacksons best days are ahead too. I bet you when they hit 18 we'll be hearing those names a lot more and the music buisness is the jackson way of life. Madonna has a daughter, and I dont know her name but shes starting a fashion line at macys! Thats pretty cool. Anyways those are jsut a couple names from young hollywood you should be paying attention too along with: Will Smith's two kids, The jolie-pitt clan, Tom cruises daughter suri is already a fashion icon, Lil waynes daughter Regina and T.I.'s step daughter are in a group together, Halle Berry's daughter Nalah, Jessica Albas baby and many many more like all the diseny stars. Anyways keep your eye on all of these people because they are the future generation of hollywood.
I have just a weird story to end this blog with. So on monday in orchestera I said something that I regreted. This has happened a lot more latley because the year is coming to an end and my filter is expiring. Anyways I regreted saying this mean comment about a teacher and I am a pretty religious girl. A lot of people don't know that because I don't meantion it much. Theres this group that prays for the country, the world, and our school every morning and I would love to join it and totally believe in what their doing but I feel like maybe their more doing it to appear "Good". Anyways so I just kind of started silently praying in orchestra because God can hear you thoughts and feel your prayers anywhere. You all know that right? Anyways as I was praying this girl turned around and just nodded her head at me and my brain said and it shall be done. I may just be crazy and it was 7 in the morning but I felt like maybe that girl was an angel or something. If you knew who I was talking about shes the nicest girl. Shes always smiling, religious and just won prom queen. It was so weird and I started wondering if maybe I have a gaurdian angel. It was probably just my imagination though.
song of the day: Run Joey Run - Glee
Newsflash of the Day: Speaking of Young hollywood justin Bieber has made the life of an older hollywood woman very difficult. Since posting the picture of him and his "Girlfriend" Kim kardashian on facebook she has recieved millions of death threats on twitter, in the mail and in every form possible. Justin bieber tweeted, "ladies calm down. @kimkardashian is a friend. a very sexy friend but a friend. no need 4 threats. Let's all be friends and hang out often ;) ". Justin is living the life. And hes already reached big heights
Hows it going? I missed you all...well not any creepers but the rest of you I missed. I seriously did i've been dying to blog all week but so much to say and so little time caused me to just keep taking notes about what to write about. This blog is so good for me you don't even know. Theres so much I want to talk about and so little time i'm just going to start the topics now. Well I wanted to chat a little bit about young hollywood. You know who I think is an adorable guy in old hollywood that a lot of people don't know. Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruises adopted son. Hes so cute. Kendall and Kylie Jenner may not have the kardashian blood but I feel a big future ahead for them. Miley Cyrus is pretty sensational in my book because she has such a big voice and she can act. The possibilties for her in the future is endless.
Prince, Paris, and Blanket Jacksons best days are ahead too. I bet you when they hit 18 we'll be hearing those names a lot more and the music buisness is the jackson way of life. Madonna has a daughter, and I dont know her name but shes starting a fashion line at macys! Thats pretty cool. Anyways those are jsut a couple names from young hollywood you should be paying attention too along with: Will Smith's two kids, The jolie-pitt clan, Tom cruises daughter suri is already a fashion icon, Lil waynes daughter Regina and T.I.'s step daughter are in a group together, Halle Berry's daughter Nalah, Jessica Albas baby and many many more like all the diseny stars. Anyways keep your eye on all of these people because they are the future generation of hollywood.
I have just a weird story to end this blog with. So on monday in orchestera I said something that I regreted. This has happened a lot more latley because the year is coming to an end and my filter is expiring. Anyways I regreted saying this mean comment about a teacher and I am a pretty religious girl. A lot of people don't know that because I don't meantion it much. Theres this group that prays for the country, the world, and our school every morning and I would love to join it and totally believe in what their doing but I feel like maybe their more doing it to appear "Good". Anyways so I just kind of started silently praying in orchestra because God can hear you thoughts and feel your prayers anywhere. You all know that right? Anyways as I was praying this girl turned around and just nodded her head at me and my brain said and it shall be done. I may just be crazy and it was 7 in the morning but I felt like maybe that girl was an angel or something. If you knew who I was talking about shes the nicest girl. Shes always smiling, religious and just won prom queen. It was so weird and I started wondering if maybe I have a gaurdian angel. It was probably just my imagination though.
song of the day: Run Joey Run - Glee
Newsflash of the Day: Speaking of Young hollywood justin Bieber has made the life of an older hollywood woman very difficult. Since posting the picture of him and his "Girlfriend" Kim kardashian on facebook she has recieved millions of death threats on twitter, in the mail and in every form possible. Justin bieber tweeted, "ladies calm down. @kimkardashian is a friend. a very sexy friend but a friend. no need 4 threats. Let's all be friends and hang out often ;) ". Justin is living the life. And hes already reached big heights
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Lets take it back a few years
To be honest I almost forgot that today was back in the day post day. Are you guys enjoying these? It kind of makes me think back and I think it helps you see kind of how I got to this place in my life now. So ever since I was a kid you can say I was a fan of documenting my life. When I was about 4 years old my parents gave me this old tape recorder and it may have been one of the best gifts they ever gave me. I used it all the time. I would record myself singing somewhere over the rainbow or just me telling silly stories then giglling at the end. My parents were good about getting me tapes to record with. When I was little my jam was the jeopardy waiting music. I loved it a lot for some reason. So I had one tape of just the little do doo do doo thing. I'll show you a pic of my with my tape recorder...
So on one of the last days I used my tape recorders it got me into trouble. I was in the back seat of my dads old grey car and in the front seat was one of his friends. I had the window open sticking on hand out and the other one holding on to my favorite little tape recorder. I was recording myself singing the barney theme song really quietly so my dad and his friend coulden't hear. My dads friend was just talking away this whole time. After I was done with the "wont you say you love me too" part I rewinded the tape (yes I said we were taking it back a few years) and got to the part where I started singing. I was super dissapointed becuase you couldent hear me at all but before I could do anything about my dads friend turned around to me and said in swahilli " your a bad girl! You can record what people are saying like that. You need to erase that right now you hear me. Bani, talk to you child". It tunred out he was trash talking his wife and I got it on tape. He didn't find it very funny and scared me to tears. After that I was careful about when I used my tape recorder and the fun ended.
So on one of the last days I used my tape recorders it got me into trouble. I was in the back seat of my dads old grey car and in the front seat was one of his friends. I had the window open sticking on hand out and the other one holding on to my favorite little tape recorder. I was recording myself singing the barney theme song really quietly so my dad and his friend coulden't hear. My dads friend was just talking away this whole time. After I was done with the "wont you say you love me too" part I rewinded the tape (yes I said we were taking it back a few years) and got to the part where I started singing. I was super dissapointed becuase you couldent hear me at all but before I could do anything about my dads friend turned around to me and said in swahilli " your a bad girl! You can record what people are saying like that. You need to erase that right now you hear me. Bani, talk to you child". It tunred out he was trash talking his wife and I got it on tape. He didn't find it very funny and scared me to tears. After that I was careful about when I used my tape recorder and the fun ended.
"Run baby run/dont ever look back/ they'll tear us apart if you give them the chace...Dont say we're not meant 2 be/run baby run 4ever we'll b u & me"
Hey everyone! So I'm going to start with a quote from the book I've been reading. Lateley i've been obbsessed with Nicholas Sparks books. They really inspire my writing because their great. The one I am reading now is Dear John. I saw the movie so I kind of know how it's going to end up but the connection between John and Savannah is so much deeper in the book. The quote is, "Passion and satisfaction go hand in hand and without them, any hapiness is only temporary because theres nothing to make it last". That quote just really stuck out to me for some reason. Well one because its good obviously. But latley i've kind of been thinking about what my passions are. (ugh, and here the tears are again. I swear this isen't just about my lifestyle changes I think it might be "over-active tear bud syndrom". I saw a comerical for this on t.v.) I guess you can say my main passion is music. Especially listening to it. I go in lots of diffrent phases with this music thing. Right now i'm back with rap suprisingly. I haven't truley loved rap since 7th grade. But i'm seeing the good in it now thanks to a certain someone called B.o.b. with help from various others.
Along with listening to music I like making it. It seems like a drag sometimes but I do legitimatly like singing, playing piano, and being in orchestra. Every once in awhile I get a peice of music that reminds me that its all worth it. The boring practicing hours and just the effort it takes. Yestruday I was talking to someone and I brought up quitting. It happens a lot with this certain friend and many other friends that I have. I guess you can say i've never quit anything in my life. Is that weird? I guess you can say I quit randomley screaming but thats not quitting thats taking a step towards regular human sanity. Whenever I sign up for something I stick too it. I signed up for a year of softball and even though I hated it I went through the season then I just didn't make anymore commitments. Does that count as quitting? Maybe it does.
I guess another passion I have is love. Thats totally not normal. I just love love. I know that sounds crazy. I like reading about love. And watching love of all diffrent kinds and of all diffrent cultures. I like romance. I like the things that come along with falling in love and the good and bad that come with it. I don't really think i've personally been in love. I have felt strongly for someone else though, many times but I dont think thats really love. I don't think i'd take a bullet for any of them...thats awful I know they just haven't proved their worth that yet. I have faith in them. But as usual i've gotten off subject but the main point of the blog is to find you passion and to stick to it. Because in the words to Nicholas Sparks, "Passion and Satisfaction go hand in hand".
song of the day: OMG - Usher
quote of the day: Passion and satisfaction go hand in hand and without them, any hapiness is only temporay because theres nothing to make it last.
Newflash of the day: Justin Bieber has managed to charm another famous hollywood chicka. Who is it this time? None of then Kim Kardashian. According to twitter, JB says hes found a new girlfriend. Kim hasen't denied rumors and admitted to meeting him in D.C. last night.
(I'm pretty sure this is all in fun and games because Kim has been seen with the spainish soccor player a ton)
Along with listening to music I like making it. It seems like a drag sometimes but I do legitimatly like singing, playing piano, and being in orchestra. Every once in awhile I get a peice of music that reminds me that its all worth it. The boring practicing hours and just the effort it takes. Yestruday I was talking to someone and I brought up quitting. It happens a lot with this certain friend and many other friends that I have. I guess you can say i've never quit anything in my life. Is that weird? I guess you can say I quit randomley screaming but thats not quitting thats taking a step towards regular human sanity. Whenever I sign up for something I stick too it. I signed up for a year of softball and even though I hated it I went through the season then I just didn't make anymore commitments. Does that count as quitting? Maybe it does.
I guess another passion I have is love. Thats totally not normal. I just love love. I know that sounds crazy. I like reading about love. And watching love of all diffrent kinds and of all diffrent cultures. I like romance. I like the things that come along with falling in love and the good and bad that come with it. I don't really think i've personally been in love. I have felt strongly for someone else though, many times but I dont think thats really love. I don't think i'd take a bullet for any of them...thats awful I know they just haven't proved their worth that yet. I have faith in them. But as usual i've gotten off subject but the main point of the blog is to find you passion and to stick to it. Because in the words to Nicholas Sparks, "Passion and Satisfaction go hand in hand".
song of the day: OMG - Usher
quote of the day: Passion and satisfaction go hand in hand and without them, any hapiness is only temporay because theres nothing to make it last.
Newflash of the day: Justin Bieber has managed to charm another famous hollywood chicka. Who is it this time? None of then Kim Kardashian. According to twitter, JB says hes found a new girlfriend. Kim hasen't denied rumors and admitted to meeting him in D.C. last night.
(I'm pretty sure this is all in fun and games because Kim has been seen with the spainish soccor player a ton)
Saturday, May 1, 2010
"Who is that girl I see/Staring straight back at me/ when will my reflection show / who I am inside..."
Dear blog,
guess what? I talked to prince. Yes I know what your thinking, "this again, hasen't she realized its not him". This time it was him. How do I know? I could tell by his voice. Yes I realized it could have been a recording but for the sake of today i'm going to pretend it wasen't. What'd we talk about? His music thing. Remember when I Taked to you about that website? I was serious. I really really liked it for the record. It has nothing to do with me being my prince but everything to do with the fact that hes really talented and he has an open passion for music that you can feel through the computer. Does that sound weird? Not to me, I can actually feel it. And I like it. I listened to this one song over and over again and this is a characteristic I only do with songs I like. Such as airplanes. My mind was telling me to say the stuff I thought about the website and stuff but instead I didn't go as deep. Why? I was nearvous. I do that around important people. And in my book prince is a step above Obama. So imagine if you were on the phone with the president. Woulden't you kind of loose what you meant to say?
But like I was saying I like it. The songs and him. For awhile it was the songs more then him but now I feel like maybe its ok to believe in love again. The reality is that the "new mariam" lost that. I had lost my belief that theres someone out there for everyone and even though it dosen't seem like it I fall under that too.
The truth is that the new Mariam cries a lot. Only instead of it being inisde crying its outside crying. Why? idk. I guess you can say its because when your waiting for something and want it SO bad and it dosen't happen it just kind of hurts. But part of being a Mariam is that even when it hurts you have to remember every cloud has a silver lining. What I always tell myself is that if your gonna live you best enjoy it. Because life is so precious and so short that every minute of it should be spent the best way. And the best way isen't holding a box of tissues crying because some boy dosen't realize what your worth. The best way is walking on the beach with no shoes on a pedicured toes. The best way is to let yourself follow your passion and do what it is you like to do. If what you like to do is watch Tori and Dean episdoes all day. Do it! If you like to sing then do it and don't worry about what your sounding like or what people will think. Just be you, always.
song of the day: Reflection: Christina Aguleria
quote of the day: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
That says nothing and everything and some of you wont understand but its crystal clear to me.
I'm also gonna quote myself because I was reading this weeks blogs and it made me crack up:
said I was gonna start being honest right. Well theres your honest right there. I read it like the bible and like every little post is the key to my happiness and all the pathetic little girls on there are mine to demolish.
I liked the demolishing part. I should use that word more often. DEMOLISH!
guess what? I talked to prince. Yes I know what your thinking, "this again, hasen't she realized its not him". This time it was him. How do I know? I could tell by his voice. Yes I realized it could have been a recording but for the sake of today i'm going to pretend it wasen't. What'd we talk about? His music thing. Remember when I Taked to you about that website? I was serious. I really really liked it for the record. It has nothing to do with me being my prince but everything to do with the fact that hes really talented and he has an open passion for music that you can feel through the computer. Does that sound weird? Not to me, I can actually feel it. And I like it. I listened to this one song over and over again and this is a characteristic I only do with songs I like. Such as airplanes. My mind was telling me to say the stuff I thought about the website and stuff but instead I didn't go as deep. Why? I was nearvous. I do that around important people. And in my book prince is a step above Obama. So imagine if you were on the phone with the president. Woulden't you kind of loose what you meant to say?
But like I was saying I like it. The songs and him. For awhile it was the songs more then him but now I feel like maybe its ok to believe in love again. The reality is that the "new mariam" lost that. I had lost my belief that theres someone out there for everyone and even though it dosen't seem like it I fall under that too.
The truth is that the new Mariam cries a lot. Only instead of it being inisde crying its outside crying. Why? idk. I guess you can say its because when your waiting for something and want it SO bad and it dosen't happen it just kind of hurts. But part of being a Mariam is that even when it hurts you have to remember every cloud has a silver lining. What I always tell myself is that if your gonna live you best enjoy it. Because life is so precious and so short that every minute of it should be spent the best way. And the best way isen't holding a box of tissues crying because some boy dosen't realize what your worth. The best way is walking on the beach with no shoes on a pedicured toes. The best way is to let yourself follow your passion and do what it is you like to do. If what you like to do is watch Tori and Dean episdoes all day. Do it! If you like to sing then do it and don't worry about what your sounding like or what people will think. Just be you, always.
song of the day: Reflection: Christina Aguleria
quote of the day: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
That says nothing and everything and some of you wont understand but its crystal clear to me.
I'm also gonna quote myself because I was reading this weeks blogs and it made me crack up:
said I was gonna start being honest right. Well theres your honest right there. I read it like the bible and like every little post is the key to my happiness and all the pathetic little girls on there are mine to demolish.
I liked the demolishing part. I should use that word more often. DEMOLISH!
" Yeah, I could use a dream or a genie or a wish to go back to a place much simpler than this" -B.o.B airplanes
Hey Readers!
I feel like the title of today is really fitting. I guess you can say I wish I could go to a time where life was more simple. Back to the elementary days where i'd hit the park saturdays and watch disney movies feeling on top of the world. Before everything was complicated and emotions were just happy and sad. Now it seems like I can't even feel right anymore. One minute i'm happy and then a few minute later its gone. It might just by pms but I'm not one of those girls that gets super crazy or anything during their periods. Last night I went to Excaliburs variety show. The theme was hollywood. It felt kind of homey to be back to junior high. Nothing had really changed. I saw some friends and the performance was great. JB (yes not d but b) was in the show. He had kind of a solo. The whole musician thing is so hott. It drives me insane. Two guys played background guitar and him and this other guy sang. He put on his shades and I was like, oh Jb. I feel like he looked up at me during part of his solo. It felt good. But he also spent a lot of time looking at this other girl. They've been best friends since birth but from the way he was looking at her he was seeing her in a diffrent light. That wasen't very good. But the whole show was just adorable.
So anyways I loved the show but as I was in the car going home I just felt sad. Like I missed some of my junior high friends, and him checking out that other girl. It just brought me down again. I dont really know what the real problem is but things just keep making me want to cry. Its been like that for...exactly a week. I'll get better though. I've figured out that it my deepest emotional levels I write some pretty killer friends. I just wrote one today and it turned out great. But the issue is when I play with my piano either the piano sucks and the singings good, the singing sucks but the piano is good or their both just ok. So I wont post this one. But I like how it turned out.
Well have a good weekend readers!
song of the day:... to be announced
I feel like the title of today is really fitting. I guess you can say I wish I could go to a time where life was more simple. Back to the elementary days where i'd hit the park saturdays and watch disney movies feeling on top of the world. Before everything was complicated and emotions were just happy and sad. Now it seems like I can't even feel right anymore. One minute i'm happy and then a few minute later its gone. It might just by pms but I'm not one of those girls that gets super crazy or anything during their periods. Last night I went to Excaliburs variety show. The theme was hollywood. It felt kind of homey to be back to junior high. Nothing had really changed. I saw some friends and the performance was great. JB (yes not d but b) was in the show. He had kind of a solo. The whole musician thing is so hott. It drives me insane. Two guys played background guitar and him and this other guy sang. He put on his shades and I was like, oh Jb. I feel like he looked up at me during part of his solo. It felt good. But he also spent a lot of time looking at this other girl. They've been best friends since birth but from the way he was looking at her he was seeing her in a diffrent light. That wasen't very good. But the whole show was just adorable.
So anyways I loved the show but as I was in the car going home I just felt sad. Like I missed some of my junior high friends, and him checking out that other girl. It just brought me down again. I dont really know what the real problem is but things just keep making me want to cry. Its been like that for...exactly a week. I'll get better though. I've figured out that it my deepest emotional levels I write some pretty killer friends. I just wrote one today and it turned out great. But the issue is when I play with my piano either the piano sucks and the singings good, the singing sucks but the piano is good or their both just ok. So I wont post this one. But I like how it turned out.
Well have a good weekend readers!
song of the day:... to be announced
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