I am not them

I'm gonna go to the background of this story before you really understand the title. Today I went to a piano fall festival and it went pretty well. The place I was playing was a few minutes away from Auntie Khadijas house so we spent the rest of the day there. I was playing with Iman and Nargis and stuff it was great. Then my mom told Auntie Khadija to talk me into staying at KU. I had told her that I want to go to NYU. She mentioned some stuff I had never even though about. A little studio (which is a bedroom and bathroom. The stove and stuff is in your bedroom and theres no room for a couch) is like 2,000 dollers in new york. Thats a month. Its a lot of money. And If I lived in a dorm in a big city it wouldent be as great. If I got sick I would be too far away for anyone to take care of me. And she told me storys about her college expirences. Like how her roomate stole all of her stuff. Anyways it really made me reconsider KU.

Then in the middle of all this she said 4 words that stuck out and really meant something to me. She said you are not them. Putting this into context she was saying that amerians are a self unit. Family and friends arent as important where as Africans are a comunity. If you do something bad you let your whole community down. If you do something good everyone in the comuntiy is happy for you. And she was talking about how they want to party and drink and get into all this bad stuff but I am not them. The way I Was raised just makes me not really want that. And then it clicked. Im not really intested in that. the whole dorm party thing. Being a girl that sleeps around in high school and dosent graduate due to a pregnancy just isent who I want to be. I dont need it. I dont desire it. I am not them.

I guess I also realized I dont need to go far away. Its not like im dieing to escape like some of my other friend. It also made me realize why sometimes I dont connect with my other friends. I am not them. We have completley diffrent mindsets. We are diffrent people but they dont get it. They dont get what makes me and them them. Its my parents and my African community. My family. I really do care a lot about all the people that make this tick. Im closer to some of my fake aunts then my real ones. And the best thing about it is there are always people who care about me.

We were talking about college and how you have to think of other things too. Like how pharmacy is good for me because when I decide to get married and have kids I just work part time and still like a more then good lifestyle from the pharmacy money. it made me figure out that all of that isent far away. And you know how people say listening to your parents is a blessing? Maybe the reason their pusing me into KU is because theres something for me there. I may be a better person because of it. Or maybe thats the place I was supposed to meet the love of my life. I dont know i cant say ive 100% given up on my dreams of leaving but I haven 100% crossed out going to KU.