Imagining

Ok have you ever sat in your bed, in your most comfy pajama's under your covers with the heather all warm and toasty and just starting Imagining. Some people think of themselves as marrying the prince of england and living on the throne line diana did. Some people see them selves on stage doing ballet and having the star role in swan lake or the nutcraker. Some people see themselves with lots of flags around them, three cell phones, and with a little nametag that says mr. president on it. Bottom line is everyone dreams and imagines at some point in their life. But what genuinly sucks is when you finally have to wake up from that dream and see the truth. Sometimes you get lost in these imaginations and start really truley believing that their in the future for you. And ive always been one for saying never give up, and you know tommorows always a better day. But not im starting to think that when it comes to be tommorws just not ever the day.


So I kinda imagined to the extreme yesturday. I thought maybe that would be the day that all of my really lame dreams came true. That it would all just fall in place. Starting with me finishing that stupid song I cant get in piano, then giving myself a fantastic nail and hair job and then going off to a dinner with my family and having a good time with my best friend (which did happen! :). and then getting the guy of my dreams. So guess which one didnt happen? ding ding ding ding ding, times up it was the last one. But I didnt fully expect it to anyways.

So there goes my perfect little imagination smashed. What sucks is I dont know where to go from here. The logical and smart person would wake up and figure out that thats not in the cards for me. The believer would sit there and listen to her favorite song and just believe that maybe yesturday was a bad day. What really sucks is I totally prayed about it for like 5 days. it really crushed my spirit to the extreme. Now I dont really know what to do my heart is saying a ton of diffrent things. I think maybe I should talk to someone but i dont know if im ready for someone elses opinion to really get in the way of what im thinking so i just blogged on you. You have officially been inside my brain, dreams, and confusion.

This is an edited version of the original post and i choose to be a believer because whats the point of anything if you dont have hope that things will get better.


Quote of the day:
whats the point of dreaming, or what will never be. Sometimes its best to give up and save your heart that pain - me

Song of the day:
Happy ending - mika (i know ive used it before but I love it and the lyrics kinda match my diffrent moods)

Book update:
Im reading Being Nikki by Meg Cabot now its a super amazing book that I really love

Tv update:
some trailers for gossip girl and one tree hill came out and im dissapointed about this one thing that happened to the great chuck bass. secret lie still goes on. And I dont even know whats going on on tori and dean anymore. schools gotten in the way.