"Just the thought of you can drive me wild...oh you make me smile"

I feel lost. About everything. It's like something happened to me and I can no longer really make decisions and don't really know what it is I want and over thing every step of everything. I don't understand it. But I feel this way often. I think its part of being young. You have to figure out life and figure things out. Somethings I think I should just let it be, you know? Just let things flow and see where they go. But sometimes they don't go anywhere. There's only so much wishing, and hoping you can do. There comes a time when you need to decide what it is you find worth fighting for, and put your all in it. It could be a charity, or a person, or anything. This thing becomes your reason for living. But the more I think about it, the more I think maybe you don't need something like that. Maybe you can live for yourself. To achieve greatness on your own and such. But what are all the treasures of the world are nothing if you have no one to share it with. These are all just the random thoughts in my head.

In other news, summer is almost over. This has been the fastest summer I ever had. June was pretty much a blur because I wasn't even home for a full week. I went to St. Louis, then camp, then over to my friends in a different city, then Canada, then chicago. It was awesome and adventure filled. It's very rare I have a summer that busy so I was glad and thankful for the fun opportunities I had. I'm really sad to see it end though. But I think going back to school will be good for me. I'll be more focused on the right things and the challenge will keep me busy. I know i'm supposed to be beyond excited that it's senior year but...I'm really not. I'm more excited for senior pictures then anything else. And prom of course is what i've been waiting for since I was little. It will be fun to ride around in a limo and get all dressed up. I'm trying to think posativley about everything but right now it just feels like bleh, why can't summer last forever....

song of the day: Smile by Uncle Kracker (kind of obsessed with this. Its a guarenteed pick me up)

quote of the day: Some want things to happen, some wish things to happen, and some make things happen