So yesturday something inside of me woke up or changed. I found out that prince read my super personal paper thing about him. I talked all about how I feel. Im pretty suprised I was able to let out feelings like that. I'm also pretty glad that he read it. (not that i'd admit that to samira anytime soon). This means that I wanted him to know all along. But along with that I wanted him to love me. And thats not going to happen unless I "make a move". So folks I'm going to make a move. The plan so far is this. Im going to send him a cd of love songs and songs that are just me.and inside there will be a list of all the songs and why I put the cd. I'll also try not to blab so much about how great he is and meantion that a reply would be fantastic. and before this im going to try to give him a heads up some how. Sounds perfect huh? WRONG

Making a move means getting a response. what if he dosent want me back. Even i'll admit that im not the perfect girl. BUT he is the perfect guy and perfection may only want perfection. what if it turns out that he dosent like me? What happens then..... well hopefully it wont go in that direction. On a posative note what if he does love me back. ahhh. he loves me back. isent that great? What if he asks me out. what if we date. ooh finally the perfect boyfriend. it would have to be long distance and i'd most likley have to tell my parents who i hope would understand. I'm kind of worried Samira would be upset with me if it turned out well. I think she'd be mad that im damning her brother to hell but she should understand I would never hurt her little angel. :)

Today is Christmas. I dont feel like i've felt in christmases past. I feel my childhoodness slipping away. I used to be super excited about opening my parents and all this stuff. But it may have just been because I had friends over so I was less into it and less religious. But I do love this day and all it represents. its my saviors birthday. :) This christmas I got: A north face jacket and clothes, An ipod touch from my mom, dad, and brother, and a really cool guitar from my uncle japhet. Its been a good christmas. I recieved lots of nice material things. I've also recieved lots of love from my family. The people who matter the most. I am truley greatful for them. really I am. (I know what your thinking, even ben samira :) ). I wonder what next christmas will be like. Every move I make effects the future and where I will be by then. I know i'll still love christmas more than all other holidays. Im also pretty sure ill feel the same way about my family and friends. And who knows maybe ill have a cute boyfriend who I love by then.....

Its been awhile so your probably wondering what i've been up too. So Samira and her little brother Aflah came. Its been fun. Me and samira chit-chatted for a long time in order to catch up on the like 5 months we didnt get to talk about boys and some other smaller subjects. Samiras been keeping me in check on the whole "right and wrong stuff". Maybe I should follow her ways. hmmm idk. We watched half of my sisters keeper. It reminds me that the days of earth are limited. and if you dont go through and do everything you want and need to do while your healthy and alive then you'll never get too. I do understand that theres heaven and nothing will ever beat it. I truley do believe it. But I still feel like thats no reason not to enjoy the life i'm living now. And I want ture love. Its important to me. I want someone to take care of me and love me unconditionally. Not necesserily now. But sometime before its too late. I will also keep the same new years resolution. to be brave. In order to reach some of my other goals. to speak my mind, and not to be scared of any situation or anything. well thats all for today readers.

MERRY MERRY MERRY MERRY MERRY MERRY MERRY MERRY MERRY MERRY MERRY
*****************************CHRISTMAS*******************************************

Song of the day: Joy to the world

Quote of the day: OMG! This is real. your going to make a move. It will be like a slap across the face to all of us. WAIT! Are you going to get married ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! - Samira Ali