Dont Be Afraid By Mariam Ali (song lyrics)

Someday, I know that it will happen
You'll figure out it was meant to be
You'll wish you knew it so much sooner
That me and you were Perfect for each other

I have a dream that maybe
one day you will let me love you

(chorus)
So don't be afraid to show me that you care boy
Dont be afraid to kiss me in teh rain
Don't be afraid to buy my favorite flowers
But most of all, Dont be afraid to let me in..

Yes I knew that we're really young
But who can choose when they fall in love
When you feel it deep in your heart
Its not ok to hold it in

(chorus)

My hearts the lock you have the key
When you smile and laugh
Hold me hand
Sing this song
You set me free

(chorus)

4.10.10

Dearest blog and blog readers, I hate to leave you guys out of my life. And normally everything worth meantioning is told to you. You've all felt my joy and sadness. Excitment and dissapointment. You have felt it all with me. And im grateful. Even if I only have one radom reader who lives in antartica or something I am grateful for you. So it wont be a suprise that im sharing some big news about my life. You ready for this. The story of Mariam and Prince is being made into a real life published story! Isen't that great? I know your probably jumping with joy reader in antartica. I cant wait until our names become one of the great romances. We'll be like Chuck and Blair, Cinderella and Prince Charming, Jacob and Bella, Lucas Scott, and BROOKE (yes I said brooke not payten he was supposed to end up with her) and the list goes on and on and on. I bet another thing your thinking is....but mariam and prince isen't a romance.

Thats when you bring tears to my eyes readers. I know that we are not a romance. Its a one way passion. Or thats what it seems like although I try to convince myself otherwise. But what I need to figure out is what to do to turn this story into a romance. It does have its comic parts like when I told my grandma about him. That was pretty funny. She even made me email a picture of him to her. and I did... (yes Samira you can use that in the story). Anyways the thing thats missing from the book is the mutual love. Here are some song lyrics to invisible by taylor swift that describe the situation from my view:

She can’t see the way your eyes light up when you smile
She’ll never notice how you stop and stare whenever she walks by
And you can’t see me wantin you the way you want her
But you are everything to me

[Chorus:]
And I just wanna show you
She don’t even know you
She's never gonna love you like I want to
You just see right through me but if you only knew me
We could be a beautiful miracle unbelievable instead of just invisible

There’s a fire inside of you that can’t help but shine through
She’s never gonna see the light
No matter what you do
And all I think about is how to make you think of me
And everything that we could be

[Chorus]

Like shadows in a faded light
Oh we’re Invisible
I just wanna open your eyes and make you realize

I just wanna show you she don’t even know you
Baby let me love you let me want you
You just see right through me
But if you only knew me
We could be a beautiful miracle unbelievable instead of just invisibleShe can’t see the way your eyes light up when you smile

this is the world we live in

My world has begun to scare me. We live in a world where good inocent people die everyday and Hue Heffner lives to be 84 (as of yeasturday). What is that? I turn on the news and its nothing but negativity. Today I woke up to the cnn breaking news headline. No the cure for cancer hasent been found, Prince william is not engaged and there is no royal wedding to look forward too. Instead the polish president, his wife, and a lot of other polish diplomats were killed in a plane crash. Imagine that? All of a countries leaders dead in mere seconds. This is the world we live in. Another headline that caught my eye was the one about the minors. They have all been found dead. Can you believe it? They head out to an average day at work and their familys and loved ones never see them again. This is the world we live in.

The pope has been making headlines latley. I wish I could tell you its because of his healing touch, or because he is preaching the word of god better than ever imagined. Nope, it has something to do with a scandel which Nostradomas predicted by the way. But there is a little good news for some of you out there. You can cheat on your wife and family as Tiger woods did, probably give your wife every form of stds possible and still be americas hero and the face of Nike. Yup he got the spot back AND Hes winning in the masterworks. And people say all the luck has run out of the wrold.

Another big thing is that a white american family adopted a russian orphan. I dont think he was a baby but he looks fairly young from the pictures definatly not 5 yet. Well guess what happened a couple days ago? They decided to give him back. Just like the shoes you bring home from the store that aren't as cute as you thought they were. Yup they dont want him anymore so they are trying to send him back to Russia. A human being is going to be retured like an object. This is the world we live in. Now a little more on that subject, the parents have reasoning that they thing should explain this situation. No they are not bad people, but the child is demented. He seriously has mental problems. Its just like the scary movie the orphan. He has some serious issues and they dont want to deal with that and dont think they should have to keep him since they werent alerted he was demented. They didnt know he wasen't going to be the cute shoe. I see their logic a little bit but whos gonna love this poor little boy. This is the world we live in.

Now I dont mean to depress you by writing this blog. Sure there are still some things that make you smile about the earth we live in. There are still some good people out there. I have no doubt that the kind souls are still out there fighting for the good thats left in the world. But the main point of this blog is to first, tell you whats going on. And make you think a little. Are you out there doing something like this? Is it right for us all to sit around and watch the world as we know cruble up (metaphoriclly and realistically with global warming and everything). We need to do something about it. Its the easiest thing possible. You ready for this, love. I dont necessarilly mean go out and make love to someone but I mean love in the wholesome state. Love your neighbor as yourself. Love the one that is unloveable. Smile. Just smile. Smile at the good people to remind them that there is still hope for the world we live in. Smile at the bad people to let them know that they haven't won this battle yet. Forgive, "forgivness...such a simple word". I know its not easy to do but sometimes you just have to let it go. I which holding a grudge against the bad would just make it go away but unfortunetly it wont. And the last thing you should do is have hope. You cant give up because that little hope you have could maybe pass on to your children, and their children, and their chilrens friends and eventually the whole world will have it agian. Four easy things that you can do to make the words this is the world we live in be words of joy.


song of the day: where is the love - Black Eyed Peas

quote fo the day: A man who was completely innocent, offered himself as a sacrifice for the good of others, including his enemies, and became the ransom of the world. It was a perfect act. - Ghandi

A small body of determined spirits fired by an unquenchable faith in their mission can alter the course of history. - Ghandi

April showers bring May flowers

Hi Readers! Hows life treating you. My life is ok...it could be better but its hard to be cheerful when its stormy and rainy. But im glad its spring. I'd rather take rain then snow anyday. But both make my hair curl up and it looks really cute for awhile untill it drys and looks bad. But you guys probably don't read my blog to hear about my hair. So the gossip of the day is that Jon Gosslin is sueing kate for primary custody. I don't watch the show but I don't know how they'll be able to have a show called kate plus 8 when kate dosen't live with the kate. But the good news is she survived the first round of dancing with the stars! Some more big news is that Jim Carrey and Jenny Mcarthy broke up. They were a really adorable wholesome couple. Some more big news is that Glee comes back next tuesday! I'm watching them on oprah as I watch this and I can not wait to see what happens next. Especially the madonna episode! Thats going to be awesome because madonna and belt it out with the best of them.

So for those of you who don't know I live in kansas! Kansas is a small state and I happen to live in one of the biggest towns in kansas. That is not saying much! I live in a small town. The only fun options of things for teenagers to do is shop downtown (we only have like 4 good stores), Swim at the outdoor or indoor pool, and go to the movies. Thats about it. Now you can always hang out with friends which is fun but eventually theres nothing left to talk about so whats one of the things that mariam does to entertain herself? Cable Television...now people tease me about it all the time but the reality is I don't have much money to spend and theres really nothing else to do so I follow my tv shows. One of my favorite on tv right now, is Gossip girl! I just adore gossip girl, me and tyra banks have that in comman. The story lines are great, they always suprise you, and last weeks was fabulous. But the sad part is my favorite couple broke up... so you all want to do me a favor. Cross your fingers and make a wish (now that wish is that mariam isen't going crazy, and that chair becomes an item again). Thank you :)

So you've probably all heard the saying I used as my title today. April showers bring may flowers. Well April has been an ok month seeing as i'm healthy, and have amazing amazing family and friends but I'm not getting far in making all my dreams come true. Education wise, as always i'm doing fantastic but i'm still looking for luuuv. At least I think I am. Sometimes I talk to my sensible friend who reminds me that i'm only 15 years old and I have my whole life ahead of me to be love. Then I talk to my non sensible friend who says look for someone. Its what you need to add some spark to your life. Go for your crushes before their in someone elses arms. But one of the many barriers between me and luv and some my other goals is the fact that i'm not as confident as I need to be to really get anywhere. I feel like if I go for things and try the only possible result is me getting hurt. And I have to say i've learned this from expirence. I can't live up to the potential that I have in my mind. I have some strong and really decent views but does it matter if no one can hear them? Sure I have this blog. And readers I tell you everything thats my buisness and some things that aren't my buisness. And if the stuff that I Type for you to enjoy would just come out of my mouth maybe i'd be somewhere else right now. To tie this back to the tittle i'm just hoping that good things will come to me along with mays flowers

song of the day: Don't Stop Believing - Glee version (speaking of glee if you go to myspace.com/gleeauditions you can send in a video of your self singing and possibly land a spot on gLee.

quote of the day:
be careful of the geeks you make fun of they'll be your boss one day - bill gates

Easter Sunday!

Happy Easter Everyone! A long time ago today Jesus Christ arose from the dead! Did that sentence hit you as hard as it hit me. He rose from the dead. He was crucified on good friday. Nailed to a cross, he was beaten and he bled. The son of God! The son of god was beaten and hated. The people of the town ordered him to be crucified. And he want through all of this to save a bunch of sinners. Is he a cool guy or what. So today us of the christian faith not only celebrate the candy leaving bunny, but we celebrate the fact that we are forgiven and as long as we believe, the eternal kingdom of heaven is all ours :) Theres my little serman for the day.

How was my easter spent (so far) ? Well I woke up early to get ready for church. Had breakfast and dressed up!! I mean really did it. Matching silver jewlard, a brand new dress, and heals! I was looking pretty decent if I saw so myself. My profile picture says it all! My mama and brother also dressed up. We arrived at church and we sang the song I have sung 15 times before on easter morning. Jesus Christ has risen today. That song proves that it is really easter and gets the feeling in me. The church was full because the twice a year people were there and our usual spot was taken. Everyone was looking sharp. New shoes and dresses were everywhere. Saint Margrets also got a visit from the easter bunny which was fun. After church we went home and I called my grandma. Shes doing great.

Then after making some phone calls to family we decided to go out for lunch but we coulden't think of a place. My mom was rooting for indian palace but I feel like thats where we always go when we want to eat at a restraunt. Then this comerical for chilii's came on television and Chilli's it was. It was pretty good. Then my mom had to go to work and now i'm just chilling. I read some bible yesturday night. I need to do it more often. I've read the whole childrens bible (back in second grade) but haven't read much since then. Its good for me too and not that bad. At least the book of Luke isen't. It made me think they should have a bible class at school. I know there are people of all religions but maybe they should have a class for all those. I have so much information about zeus who isen't even a real god in my head and its "wrong" to study my own at school. Oh well, thats what home is for. I hope you all have a very HAPPY EASTER! luv ya readers!

song of the day: Jesus christ has risen today

Quote of the day: Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die - John 11: 25-26

TAYLOR SWIFT CONCERT = Best day of my life

Yesturday, April Second, 2010 I saw my idol and favorite singer right in front of my eyes. It was unbelieveable, undescribable, and amazing. But let me take it back a bit. Remember a long time ago when I got tickets to taylor swifts fearless tour at sprint center? Well I finally got to use my ticket. So me, akira, and my mama took of to sprint center. Only Akira and I had tickets and my mom planned on just hanging out in kansas city till it was over. When we got there, there was a TON of people. Taylor Swift sold out the sprint center after all. So we arrived right at 6 when the door open. I started by buying a taylor swift fearlesss t-shirt, and a poster that has now settled in its permenant home in my room. Then akria and I went up the gigantic escalator to our seats. Glorianna was the first opener and did a pretty decent job. I didn't know any of their songs. At the end of glorianna my mother calls me and tells me some guy just sold her flat, on the floor tickets for $35 dollars!! She had a better seat then me!! Then Kellie Pickler Performed really well. i loved listening to I wonder, Red High heels, and the best days of your life! Those are all really amazing songs.

Right after Kellie Pickler finished performing Akira and I decided to take a risk and do something bad for once. We wanted to be up close. So together we ran and snuck down to some open seats we found down close to the front! Just as we arrived to our "new" seats Taylor swift came out! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! That does not even cover it. Everyone in the whole place was screaming their heads of before she sang a note! You would too!!! It was taylor swift in all her shinning glory just a few feet from you!!! It was the best expirence i've ever had!!! She Started the show out with you belong with me and killed it. Then she sang our song and teardrops on my gutiar. After that was Tell me why and thats when the people wanted their seats. So Akira and I were trying to head back up top when Taylor Swift was about to do an outfit change. We were gettign ready to head out the door and up to our seats but the security lady would not let us go through! I just didn't understand why. We showed her our tickets and everything! Then she asked if we had a wristband.And we were like no. Guess what??? Turns out Taylor Swift was back there!!! Getting ready to suprise the audience!! She had so much love she gets out there and starts singing then takes a break to touch peoples hands, and give them hugs!!

Guess who was like 5 inches away from taylor swifts face. My mama!!! That was the section she was also in that taylor swift went out to sing from!!!!! She didn't get to touch her but it was the coolest thing ever! I was jealous. Her voice is phenomenal. Everyone who makes fun of her singing dosen't know shi*. She is the best performer I've ever seen. Way better then even alicia keys!!! I sang along to every song and danced along. It was just a great expirence. She sang all my favorite songs. Her best friend Abigail from lawrence was with her and she spent quite a lot of time on the stage. She played guitar and sang with taylor on a song. She rocked out on the violin for love story. She was also having the time of her life. Then there was this part during the show where Taylor Swift ahd just finished singing a song. And the audience was loving her. All thousands and thousands of us were screaming as loud as we could showing her the love. Taylor Swift stopped everything, took off her ear plugs and stuff and she just stopped, looked around and soaked it all in. She did this for a couple minutes with the biggest smile on her face. Then she says simple words with pure joy "Kansas City, I think I'm gonna love you forever!". It was awesome and a really moving moment!

Taylor Swift was living her dream and you could see it in her eyes and the way she was just having fun with her best friend. I don't know if i'll ever see anything that amazing again, but I'm glad I got to see this. That concert to me was living. I felt more alive then i've felt in a long time. Sitting around doing homework, chores, studying, watching tv or whatever isen't life! It reminded me that theirs a whole world out there to live in and enjoy. Even my mom said she hasen't had that much fun in forever. And she didn't even know all the songs or all the words. Every once in a while a person has to live. Do whatever it takes to feel grateful to be alive. From now on I don't think i'm gonna miss a concert. I will never forget the day I saw TAYLOR SWIFT!!!

song of the day: You belong with me - Taylor Swift

Celebritys i've seen live: Taylor Swift, Kellie Pickler, Glorianna (4 celelbs), Alicia Keys, Neyo, Jordin Sparks, and Barack Obama! (I am a very lucky girl! )

4/1/01

Ok so I have some big news for you guys. I know you'll all be really excited but I promised him i'd keep it a secret but I just cant hold it in anymore. Guess who i've been secretly dating for two weeks (yes, one of the weeks was an affair....), Me and JD are an item, non-exclusive for now. AHHH! Amazing huh? Too bad its not true. April Fools readers! That goes for the date as well. The sad thing is thats the only april fools joke i've told all day. I got pranked once today, by my computer application teachers. I walk into class and realize my mouse didn't work, and after a minute of confusion I figured out that my mouse works on Marina who was sitting next to me's screen. It was so cool! But eventually I figured out all we had to do was untangle them and go back to normal. It was a funny was to start class though. Any cool April Fools jokes happen to you readers? (notice I'm trying to be more interactive. yay me! )

The weather has been amazing here in lawrence kansas! I'm in love with it. We've have 80 degree weather two days in a row. Yesterday I brought out the skirt, and today I was able to wear a tank top and my Capri's again!! Its been a long, cold winter and thank god its over! Did anyone see googles home page today? It said Topeka. No it was not just an april fools joke but Topeka, Kansas changed their name to google for a couple day to promote this testing of some new super high speed internet. So google returned the favor by changing their name to topeka for a couple days. Look it up its no joke.

So something cheered me up today. Today I had an okay lunch with my friends. Thank god it wasn't dead silent like yesterday's. The lunch was nasty and I didn't realize it till I got to the table and thank god somebody ate it so the food didn't go to waste (not that it would have gone to the starving anyways). Anyways after lunch me and my friends (Taz, Akira, and Olivia) headed for the ledge only to find out it was taken. Some people just don't understand that I called the ledge like the very first week of school. Its also my fire saftey plan. If the school lights on fire, i'll break the window, go through the ledge, and land in the grass. then run for my life. But this is the me with super strength.

Anyways back to the good part of the story. So I left the ledge and went to stand over by the area that overlooks the cafateria with my girls. We were just blabbing about stupid stuff you know. Then I turn around and there is JD, I sensed him behind me but I thought he didn't see me. When I turn back around Olivia goes "he was just looking at your legs". And I was like "Really?!?!?!?" and she goes "yeah for the longest time, I was like just take a picture already it will last longer " :) AHH! he noticed me. And he noticed that I had nice, pretty, shaved, and lotion'd legs today (as always!) I know what at least one of you is thinking. Bad, Bad, Bad but It totally made my life. The guy that I check out was checking me out! :)Then at the end of the school day I saw him from afar and he also saw me. So I attempted to cutley walk then when I get closer to him he pretends (?) to look another direction so I walk by him then turn around for one last glance and he is looking my way too! With hope he watched me walk out of the school and missed my almost trip. haha.

So guess what tomorrow is? THE TAYLOR SWIFT CONCERT!!! I am soooo excited. I know Akira and I are going to have a good time! I'll give you all the details saturday.

song of the day: Love story - Taylor Swift

Quote of the day:If you enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing the same, then everything that happens in between can be dealt with. - Michael jackson
Let us dream of tomorrow where we can truly love from the soul, and know love as the ultimate truth at the heart of all creation. - Michael Jackson