Gonna talk some chris brown and rihanna stuff on tommorows episode of NOW FOREVER ALWAYS!

Great day!

I had one of the worlds best days today and I figured I should share it with you. I woke up late because I didnt hear my alarm or something happened and I figured that that was the sure sign to a failure day. So I had to do everything 3 times as fast then made it to school with barley enough time. I got to orchestra and we played my favortie winter concert piece. A christmas festival which is really jolly and stuff. And guess who showed up? Peter! Have I told you about peter. well hes this blond, blue eyed senior boy!! Very cute. And whenever he comes to orchestra he goes right to the back of the room and sits next to me and we play. I mean maybe its because he wants to share music but he has his own and Im hoping its because he likes sitting by me. I guess ill admit to flirting a little bit :) Apperently im the most obvious flirter in the world. but anyways. After orchestra he came AGAIN into my seminar class and we talked. Thats a really big accomplishment for me. And guess who else came to seminar? Another blond blue eyed boy. Rueban. And I talked to him as well. i have competition...my friend olivia...but I honestly think i have a better chance then her, not to be mean.


Its was a great day for my love life. Then right after school Samira called and it was great!! The day just kept getting better. I got my hair done and then when I got home I found out my mommy cooked african lasanga. mmmm. It is delicious. Its basically pasta with mchuzi, some other stuff and cheese and its yum. But right after that i realized I had homework. and I did that for an hour. and did have time to call back samira! Ill have to call her tommorow. I had like an actual point to discuss but I forgot it and hopefully ill remember by tommorow.

song of the day:
Forever and always (piano version)

Quote of the day:
Ding dong the witch is dead, which old witch? the wiked witch!

So everyone has been told by their parents dont do this? And if you havent then you must be the perfect child, call cnn right now!! Now everything you learn you supposedly get from your parents right. So if a small kid drops the f-bomb and the mother says dont say that when they you that as every other word is it right? I mean I know that the goal of a parent is to make the kid the best thing they can be but whats the point if your gonna go on and do it anyways.


I think that the parent in that senerio is like the 14 year old girl who cant take her own advice, even though she knows it a good idea. Theres just a block. anyways enough third person talk. Did you know that Im gonna be singing at a MLK assembly? I dont know if I talked about it yet but im getting pretty excited. Its a small group thing in diversity club. Im started to really like it there. Feel a little more at home. Same with freestate. I had to work in a group in english today and it went ok. Like we were gossiping and talking like friends. I like schools that feel like a second home, because if it dosent its just a little awkward.


Now im also thinking about being perfect. Its everyones goal right, perfection? Us christians say W.W.J.D as in what would jesus do and its supposed to help us make decisions because Jesus was perfect and we should be a perfect human. But the truth is we arent are we. No one is. Whenever I tell my mom not to do something and say W.W.J.D she always shes "AH, mungu hana doa ata moja, mi nitam pata wapi. (God dosent have a single stain, how can I keep up with him). But thats not a reason to stop trying to be the best person right? I want to agree with that and at some point I want to say no. Because no matter how hard a person trys they will not be perfect. And why should you spend so much time thinking about what a perfect person would be or do when you cant be that. In a way im thinking that you should be the best you possible. If you do drugs the first step for the best you would be you being drug free. If thats all you can do I think you should be proud of yourself because there is someone out there who couldent do what you did. I mean there are few people who should be proud of themselves at all you know? Most people did at least 1 good things with their life and you should be happy with that.



song of the day:
Love me - Justin beiber

Quote of the day:
Just because something dosent do what you planned it to dosent mean its usless

I dont know why but for some reason im trying to get my feelings out now! Like for some reason I just want to yell to the world all this stuff. Like today when I was talking to samira on speaker phone where I wanted to yell I like prince, a lot. And I didnt feel like i'd have regrets. Now I tell my friends my real opinion on a lot of stuff and I dont feel guilty for telling the truth wheater it be good or bad. I like it. Like I have nothing to be scared of anymore. Its part of the whole im more comfortable with myself thing.

Im really dissapointed in something. Obama is slipping under the cracks. And the thing is that he cant fail because if he fails its like every black person failed almost. Because no one has had the oppurtunity he has had. And for some reason, I know people talked about bush all the time and it didnt matter to him because I never believed in him but I believed in obama and it sucks that people are talking about him and stuff you know!

I dont have very much to say today but next blog wont suck as much I promise!!!

Song of the day:
the boy who knew too much - Mika

quote of the day:
"TEACHER ABUSE, TEACHER ABSUSE!! Um brooke, that means the teacher is being accused -6th hour chemistry class.

Life with mariam on nov. 1

This is it! I finally saw it today at 4:15. It was amazing. It was better then that it was pure genius. Every little person in the movie was so crucial to the succsess. You get to see exactly what goes on before a show and ofcourse you get to see michael jackson doing what he does best. He wanted everything to be perfect. He picked 10 dancers out of a thousand to be his backup. You get to hear their storys. The backup singers were so excited. Everyone loved m.j. And I also loved how he always says thank you in the movie and god bless you. He was a caring person. I wish more then anything I could have seen it life. It would have been amazing. I Can talk about this movie for hours you can ask my dad but it worth seeing 20 times. Go see it....now if possible.


So I had a good bus ride home! This really cute guy named Rueban came and sat on the seat next to me. and hes a really sweet guy. You know the kind of guy whos nice to everyone? Thats him. hes the only boy or person really in the whole school who ive seen talk to this one guy in a wheel chair. And he talks to the people no one likes. And hes really easy to talk too and sweet. Hes blond but hes not your typical blond he likes everyone alike. And he just turned 15!! Hes not gonna be 16 for a year just like me!!! I think maybe hes the right one for me. I know what your thinking...that makes 4 right ones. In case you've lost track prince a.k.a #1, Rueban officailly #2 and #1 in lawrence, sean, and jacob whos no longer that important to me. You want to know why dont you....

I was talking to my friend taz today about how much I loved bad boys. And I was describing them to her. As the ones who do whatever they want whenever they want and dont care what anyone thinks. Their risk takers. And then she said something genius. Taz: Why would you like someone so oppisite of you? You do realize if they wont care about you either right. She is totally right. then she asked me what I like about the personality and I was left saying idk. I dont know. and I guess I really dont like bad boys. I learned something about myself. none of the above are bad except for jacob but there are two jacobs. one 2 years older and one a year younger. anyways im going boy crazy.

Song of the day:
Bad romance - Lady gaga

quote of the day:
pianist: I can play any way you want, if you want more bootie just tell me (this was during rehersal for the way you make me feel and I believe they were refering to more time with that woman dancing with him)
M.J. : Laughing, thats funny, more bootie
pianist: I mean....
M.J. cuts him off: Dont worry I know exactly what you mean

Is it possible to fall out of love?

Ive wanted to blog about this for awhile now but I keep forgetting. The answer to the question of the day: Is it possible to fall out of love? has a lot of diffrent answers in my mind. The first way is from examples in my life because i dont know anyone better then I know myself. Im not really sure if ive been in love. Ive felt really strongly about guys but I think in order to truley be in love there are some things that have to happen. Physically and emotionally that I havent really been in yet. So no I havent. But the people that I have thought i realllly liked ive managed to stop liking. This would be in 7th and 8th grade with brent and levi. I just stopped and never really thought about it again.

But im thinking if you've reallly been in love that person is always gonna be part of you. especially if you've had sex. I dont know much about it but I think that if your that close and that connected to someone to the point where you become one then it would be hard to let go. But then there are those situation where people change. And their not the person you fell in love with. Or maybe your the one who changed and your looking for something diffrent. I can kind of see that if the person is diffrent and you dont like the new things about them that you dont like them but im thinking your still gonna be in love with the old traits right?

But a love story with a tragic twist (love story none the less) is the whole btk and woman who married him thing. She kept his secret for a long time. And they had a functioning marrige. She still loved him even though she knew he was murdering and torturing people. I dont think I could do that. With anyone. But you know I always say loving someone is loving their flaws....weird. But also people get divorced ALL the time. Especially in america. and when they do that it means they dont love each other anymore. But maybe they do love each other but they bug each other too much to last. I dont know but I have to answer the question.

So people cant fall out of love but they can change is the answer. So im still at the maybe stage. If that makes any sense.

Song of the day:
Jump then fall taylor swift

Quote of the day:
The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire.

Halloween weekend

It is no longer halloween. But to be honest it didnt really feel like it was halloween the whole day. Olivia watson put on a witches hat and a blond wig and I wore a tiara and we took my brother the storm trooper out trick or treating. We hit a lot of houses and it was pretty fun. But I guess by growing up im missing that feeling of excitment and enjoyment from the halloweens past. Its just not the same. Oh and some sad news. Its been exactly a year since my first kiss and I havent been kissed since. Sad huh? Oh wells.

I have this periodic table thing to work on and for some reason im just not feeling up too it. I had a really weird dream. I was camping and then I asked this guy from my history class who Im not friends with and dosent speak english to hold my bad untill we got back to school. And I accidently gave him the bad with all my clothes in it instead of the one with my toothbrush. Anyways he never gave my clothes back so I reported it and me and my mom went on a chase and I got all my clothes back from this terrible pick up truck. It was weird.....

I watched a movie yesturday. It was knocked up. I know it dosent sound like my kind of movie right? Well i loved juno so i figured it was more or less the same thing and so I watched it. I was SO dissapointed. Rated R movies should be Rated for reality. It was so sad. It wasent romantic at all. Untill the end. There was this couple who really didnt even like each other and the mom thought the dad was cheating on her but he was really just going to diffrent places alone to hang out with the guys and to get away from her. This was the brother and the sister of the girl who got knocked up. Who was katherine heigel by the way. Shes a great actress. But what I loved about it was the guy who knocked her up. He was big and had curley hair and was awkward. But he treated her like a princess and was there. It was reality and it was nice. But there were some scenes in vegas...........

Song of the day:
Waking up in vegas - Katy perry & TRY SLEEPING WITH A BROKEN HEART :Alicia keys

Quote of the day:
I have great hand eye coordination...I wear contacts (ok cheesey but I came up with it yestruday).