There are people out there who dont deserve the gift of life. Its one thing to breath and keep your heart breathing and its another thing to really truley live. The way I see it living is doing the things you love, being happy, caring for others, helping charaties, and feeling. Not nessecarily just feeling happy emotions but I mean really truley feeling like the sadness you feel when you find out the one you love didnt ever really love you, or the happiness you feel when your husband came home from iraq alive. The moments when you are truley feeling. And sometimes your feelings are scary. So some people choose to block out any feeling they could possibly have and be numb by using drugs and alcahol and other things that kind of disgust me. When thier numb they think that they are living better than everyone else who is suffering because they dont feel. But what they dont understand is that feeling pain, and sadness is better than not feeling at all. Im gonna go back to these people but first im gonna talk about a little girl I saw on sixty minutes. She cant feel. She was born unabled to do it. And some people thing , oh how wonderful. God has really blessed her. When she falls down and scraps her knees she dosent feel it. If someone were to break her nose she would feel nothing. But the way sixtey minutes portraied it it was a bad thing. Because imagine if someone were every to take advantage of her they could cut her arm off and she could bleed to death and not even feel it. Not even know whats going on. The girl has had some problems in life. She had to go through all kinds of trainings and tests. When I saw the episode she was about 6 or 7 but I dont know how old she is now. She was trained to say ow when anything abnormal happened to her during physical activity like gym or playing on the park. But shes constantly having to go through check ups because she wouldent feel if lets say her appendix broke open. Some would say she isent living, but I think its the oppisite. Because although she cant feel physically she can feel from her heart. Which is what really counts. listening to your heart and knowing whats right and wrong. Not by what society says but from your heart. There are numb, crazy people out there who are not living. And if they are their definatly not stopping to think from their heart. On friday a woman from lawrence, kansas passed away. It was a typical day her, her daughter, and her mother and law all went out ot starlight to see a concert. They got back in their car and were heading towards lawrences when a bunch of stray bullets shot through her window or something of that matter and she died in the car while her daughter was siting just inches away from her, helpless. The person who was letting off those bullets didnt have a heart. Imagine killing anyone. I cant do it. I could never pull a trigger to a gun knowing I would kill a person or an animal that has someone. Everyone has someone on earth that loves them. wheather they know it or not. And pulling that trigger will hurt that person or peoples out there who loves them more than you could EVER imagine. I mean think of the pain that the woman herself felt as the gun shot went through her body. Or the pain her daughter felt as she watched her mother die. And let me tell you I knew this lady and she seemed like the last person to deserve something like this. She was nice and sweet and polite. She said hi to everyone and was friendly. She loved her family and was a big part of the church I attend. She didnt deserve this and no one does. So next time you hear a friend of yours talking about buying a gun, or a friend of yours say their in a gang or doing something that would take them out of their right mind. Make a diffrence. I dont mean to sound like a chessy comercial but if you could save a life in any way, do it. People are dieing ever seconds for reasons that could be solved simply by water. or a few grains of rice. Some people are dieing of diseses that there are cures for simply because they cant afford the $20.00 for the pill they need or the surgery they would need. I want to change that. Right now I dont know how to do it. But as I grow and become older I want to some way help people. I want to make it so that girl who watched her daughter die never had to feel that pain. Or the mother who held her dead child due to water shortage never has to go through that. Part of it is needing money. I dont really have that right now im not working my main focas is school. But when I grow up I want to do my part in healing the world. wheather its through something as simple as recycling or becoming a docter and having a free clinic once a week or something. Im still figuring it out. But I guess the point of all this is listen to your heart and live every moment doing what you love to do because you never know when it will all end for you.

Quote of the day ( I decided to keep it light and a little on the humorous side since my blog was slightly depressing and serious today): I honestly dont know where she is. Why dont you look in the yellow pages under W for whore, but wait you should probably look under H she was never really that bright. - Dan scott from one tree hill

Song of the day:
Knock you down - Keri Hilson
and if everyones heard the remix to all my life playing in abrocrombie and fitch and they know the name please let me know. Its and amazing song.

for the couch potatoes like me:
Secret life of the american teenager has a brand new episode tomorow. We'll find out if amy and ben are going to italy together and if they'll take john. Whats new with adriane and ricky ,and grace and jack.