"You're more then everything I need; You're all I ever wanted..."

Hello,
This blog post is coming to you from my dinning room table with the first Presidential debate of this campaign on television. Obama is dominating defending Obamacare, and Romney is trying to kill Big Bird. I don't know about you, but I grew up watching PBS. That's the one channel that actually has programs to educate young children. Anyways, I find the debate today kind of boring. I'm just watching to support my president. Today is Barack & Michelle Obama's 20th wedding anniversary. 20 entire years of your life spent with someone else. Can you imagine that? I've lived seventeen years, and God willing someday i'd like to see my twentieth anniversary. Barack and Michelle are my favorite celebrity African American couple. Yes, I put them above Beyonce and Jay Z. People magazine did a story on their first date, and they had Ben & Jerry's on the curb enjoying the breeze. How cute is that? They could go do anything in the world with their special day, but they chose to go to The Cheesecake Factory. Don't get me wrong, I love the cheesecake factory but you'd think they'd go somewhere super fancy. When two people really like each other things like expensive restaurants and fancy gifts don't matter. It's just about enjoying your time together and more then that : your life together.

I'm a hopeless romantic and a big believer in marriage. It makes me sad to see that 50% of couples don't make it anymore. I think there's something to say about making a commitment to each other. When I was young, I watched Dragon Tales (on PBS *romney smug smirk*) and there were two dragons with connected heads. They always said that two is better then one. When you're together you can over come challenges you never could have faced alone. You have someone that constantly supports you and is always on your side. Yesterday, I watched Khloe Kardashian's wedding to Lamar Odom. I think it was quite the fairytale with only knowing each other a month. Three years later, and they beat the odds. Everyone said that they wouldn't make it, but they did. They're going through the whole baby making issue (Khloe isn't producing eggs), but Lamar stood by his wife and didn't just walk away when things get tough. Their huge saying was the "when you know, you know". Right now, I don't know.

I understand that in order to have a love like the one you see in couples like Barack & Michelle, Beyonce & Jay Z, and Khloe & Lamar you need to have your own thing going for you first. To be the best possible significant other, you have to have all of your ish together. It helps to know your values, your limits, and be willing to make sacrifices for the other person. Lifes' experiences lead you to be ready to make those kind of sacrifices. One of my favorite love songs is God Blessed the Broken Road. I wrote a whole book themed around it. There's a line that said "Every long lost road, led me to where you are/Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars/Pointing me on my way into your loving arms/this much I know is true. That God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you". I think i'm currently on the broken road. As sad as it is to hear about people with these wonderful love lifes (and stupid national boyfriend day on twitter), I think maybe the world is preparing me to be just right for when the right person comes along. I don't want to stop believing in love. It's got to be more then just a fairytale you tell to little kids because you see people like Barack & Michelle or even my parents making it work every day. But for me now it's the single life, and God Bless the Broken Road is my anthem.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wFad-8Afczw

Song of the day : Wanted by Hunter Hayes. I'll tell you a secret. My love for Trey Songz and Thomas Robinson aside, there's this new boy playing the piano with a baby face and a brilliant smile. I've always had a thing for sweet country boys like him. It doesn't hurt that I pretend he's singing to me right. Here's the link to his music video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ruyaKdPfTN4

Quote of the day: "Love is a song that never ends" - Bambi

"I've spending the last eight months thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end, but on a wednesday in a cafe I watched it begin again"

Hello world,
I meant to have made like fifty blogs in between this and the last one. I get all these ideas, but time doesn't ever give me a chance. I miss speaking my mind. I feel like lately i've been seeing the world through new eyes. Four people that have had an impact on my life are sick. All four of them were sudden illnesses. Brain injuries, Cancer, car accidents, and cancer + a car accident (worst combo). I feel like crying just thinking about it. This is new for me..all the sudden tears. I'm not really a crier. Especially not in public, but the last few sunday's i've spent singing in church praying and singing have moved me to tears almost every time. I stayed in control, because that's just the kind of girl I am. I don't break down, because I don't like being in the position to explain to anyone what's going on or how I'm feeling. It's not me. I guess i'm an introverted person with exceptions. There are certain people I feel like I can tell anything and everything to, but even my mother doesn't see me cry.

Anyways, seeing all these people's lives change so suddenly made me realize a couple different things. The first was that from here on out it has to be me and my God. No peer pressure, or anything else leading me down the wrong path. Life can end in an instant, and it is my belief that when this life ends the eternal one can  begin. If you stay close to God, and follow the teachings. I've also realized that all the problems that I let dominate my life in the past don't matter in the big picture. When it's life or death, it won't matter that I got a B on an exam, wrote a bad song and put it on youtube, wore sweat pants three days in a row, or any of that other stuff I occupy my thoughts with. What will matter is the person I am, and how i've chosen to spend my time here on earth. The third thing that has come out of this tragic situation is joy. It sounds sick that i've found happiness through this all, but I'm an optimist. I believe with a faith that could move the mountains. My four loved ones will heal despite what doctors and statistics say.

I've chosen to smile, because I realized that I am blessed beyond belief. My health and the health of my family is enough to keep me smiling no matter what. I'm not going to let little things get me down anymore. I go to a college campus where everyone needs anti-depresents. I wish I was kidding, but i'm not. Well kind of : Anti- depressents are bad and make you a vegetable. Only take em if you need em. But anyways at my campus, people walk around frowning all the time. I half smiled at someone (on accident <--- that's how sad it is. Not smiling is a thing) and they asked "what you lookin at?!". Yes, this really happened. But even all these negative people around me won't bring me down, because I have the joy of the lord, the joy of good health, the joy of wonderful people, and too many more blessings to count.

The last thing that happened? I started thinking about him again... Lord help me. We all know how this story ends.

song of the day: Begin Again by Taylor Swift (I'm in love with this song!! Only 20 days till red comes out)

quote of the day: Don't cry because it's over, Smile because it happened - Dr. Suess